


collide the spaces that divide us

by starfish_prime



Category: RWBY
Genre: Best Friends, F/F, Friends to Lovers, Mild Smut, Mutual Pining, Post-College AU, Self-Discovery, future fluff
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-03-29
Updated: 2019-05-15
Packaged: 2019-12-26 03:02:28
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 23,530
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18274463
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/starfish_prime/pseuds/starfish_prime
Summary: Sometimes the last person you expect to see is the one you missed most.//Yang waited by the truck while keeping a protective eye on Blake, pulling the keys from her front pocket. She never noticed the sway in the woman’s walk and she knew it wasn’t intoxication — the movements were too smooth and fluid. Knowing this woman will be the death of her, Blake’s silhouette made her want to suffer a slow and agonizing death.//*Tags and rating might change in the later chapters.** I suuuuuck at summaries...





	1. the weight that brought us here

Rager. The definition meaning a large, wild party. The exact thing Yang found herself indulged in on a Friday night. Red solo cup in hand, contents include whiskey diluted with cola to defeat the bite and the burn it inflicted — not that she minded the taste or anything.

She walked past her former classmates, dodging the rambunctious actions the guys wagered as if there were women to impress and win over. She rolled her eyes as she moved through the crowd, bringing the cup to her lips. The night air swept past her skin amongst the body heat and lights shining down, winter slowly made its exit for spring and Yang couldn’t be more thrilled. She hated the cold and everything that came with it: static, coats, dry skin... just to name a few reasons. All justifiable in her opinion.

She searched the crowd for her friend, eyes bouncing from person to person but to no one resembled Pyrrha. The redhead was usually easy to spot but it seemed like the woman purposely made herself nonexistent, “Where the fuck could you possibly be...” The whisper was the first sign of exasperation, followed by an annoyed growl. She knew Pyrrha was going to ditch her to find Jaune but she didn’t think she would be gone the entire night. “Whatever,” she mumbled, dragging her boots across the gravel towards the cars parked within a stones throw. She wasn’t ready to leave but she wanted a secluded place to brood.

Taking another sip, she looked to her left and spotted a familiar woman sitting on the tailgate of her silver short-bed truck. She was alone with a similar red cup beside her, legs swinging off the side in content. The girl was beautiful, strikingly so that others she knew paled in comparison. Yang couldn’t believe she was here, in the flesh.

Yang’s palms grew damp with a hurricane crashing in her chest, breath hitched in her throat followed by a sharp swallow. The cup switched hands, one-by-one, to wipe them across the fabric of her torn and faded blue jeans, although the action seemed fairly moot because her palms were drenched seconds later. ‘ _Lord_ ,’ Yang thought, ‘ _Why is she here?_ ’

By the time she was within a few feet, the gravel beneath her boots alerted the woman, making eye contact and a smile touch her lips. Yang returned the gesture by raising her cup, “Hey... Blake. Mind if I join you? Pyrrha kinda blew me off. No, scratch that, she did blow me off and now I can’t find her .” She chuckled having admit that. ‘ _I must sound like a loser_.’

The woman beamed and pat the empty spot next to her, a hollow sound echoed through the bed of the truck. “Feel free. It’s your truck after all. I kinda got blown off, too. Weiss begged me to come so she didn’t show up alone. She basically came just to see her girlfriend.” She looked toward the crowd surrounding the live bonfire, watching the party goers throw their empty beer bottles into the flames. “They’re probably making out somewhere.”

Yang couldn’t help but laugh at the woman’s admittance as she used her empty hand to support her weight, “Are you jealous or something? ‘Cause it sounds to me like you’re jealous.” Her eyes locked onto Blake’s dark gold, taking a slow and meticulous sip.

“Really? Am I that transparent?” She rolled her eyes before sipping lightly on her drink at hand, crossing her legs atop the cool steel beneath her.

Yang chuckled at Blake’s dramatic undertone. She knew Blake’s dating history from when they were younger til now. She couldn’t say she liked the guy she’s been with for the past two years but she would never tell Blake that. 

“Not in the slightest. You’ve always been one of those people I could never see through...” The blonde brought up a knee while the other hung off the edge of the cool metal, back resting against the side of the bed. The glow from the fire accentuated Blake’s stark features in a way she hadn’t seen in a long time. The sight tugged at her chest. Blake was always one of those girls who knew she was beautiful but would never admit, nor agree to it. And Yang wanted her to know.

The silence was excruciatingly louder than the shouts and hollers from the men as they tried to gain the attention of some poor victim. Yang looked into her cup, observing what was left of her drink then aimlessly sloshed it around

“So... You said Weiss has a girlfriend? How did I not know about this?” Yang rested her forearm on her knee, flicking her thumb against her pointer finger. “Do I know her?”

Blake simply nodded as she looked away towards the party, “Yeah... You do.”

“Well, now my interest has been piqued! Should we find them and fuck Weiss’s night up for ditching her best friend over some girl?”

“I don’t know, Yang... Weiss really likes her. I think it might be a serious thing,” she turned back to meet Yang’s thoughtful expression, “but don’t blow a gasket trying to figure it out.”

“Is she someone I see on a daily basis?”

Blake tilted the cup back, clearing the contents in one swig. Seeing Yang interested in this mystery girl amused her. “I’m not telling you. You’re just going to have to figure it out.”

Yang was at a loss and it showed, “You act like it’s my sister or something...” Blake’s silence spoke volumes. “ _Is_  it Ruby?”

Lips were pursed as she debated whether or not to disclose the truth. The thought of lying to Yang sank a weight deep in her stomach so she, against her trust with Weiss, chose to give in to the blondes inquiries, “Weiss asked me not to tell anyone until she was ready. Please don’t be mad at them for not telling you.”

Yang turned her attention to the glowing clouds that covered the waning moon, taking a deep breath before she spoke, “I’m not mad, Blake. Surprised, actually. Didn’t think Ruby had it in her to hook someone like Weiss. Maybe I should be taking notes.” An infectious chuckle slipped and it was enough for Blake to do the same.

“I’m sure Ruby learned a thing or two from you. She’s always talking about how great you are and how much she adores you,” Blake watched how Yang’s composure adjust from shock to alleviation. The woman in front of her usually put her emotions on display, whether or not she wanted to. That’s one of the few qualities that made her interesting to be around. “I can see why she does.”

Yang dropped her eyes down to the shining metal beneath them, a smile casted across her face, “Thanks. I want her to be happy with whatever she does. And if Weiss makes her happy then I’m happy.”

Thunder rolled in with the clouds followed by cool and dense raindrops hitting them unexpectedly. “Looks like we’re about to get rained-out. Would you... Like a ride home? Or would you rather stay here with these losers? I’m gonna dip outta here myself,” Yang jumped off the tailgate, drink in one hand and the other out to assist Blake.

The brunette quickly took it before sliding off the cool metal. She collected her empty cup and Yang’s to be polite and watched the blonde effortlessly lift the gate which slammed with a deep metal crash. “I’ll probably just get out of here, too. Parties aren’t really my thing.” She poured the rest of Yang’s dark drink into the grass beside the wide back tire then made her way to the nearest trash can that overflowed with plastic carnage. 

Yang waited by the truck while keeping a protective eye on Blake, pulling the keys from her front pocket. She never noticed the sway in the woman’s walk and she knew it wasn’t intoxication — the movements were too smooth and fluid. Knowing this woman will be the death of her, Blake’s silhouette made her want to suffer a slow and agonizing death. 

Rain began to steadily pelt everything in sight within the few minutes they decided to call it quits at the party. Blake picked up her pace to the passenger side as Yang drifted to the driver side. Fingers hooked underneath the handle which slipped off because of the rain against smooth and unblemished paint. The door opened from the inside, watching Yang lean back to her spot. Her eyes were calculating; they were designed for danger.

Blake slammed the heavy steel door of the old truck, fingers running through her damp bangs as she took in her surroundings. It felt like years since the last time she had been in Yang’s truck. When she began to look back on those fond memories, she realized it had been literal years. “I forgot how much I missed this truck.” She looked to Yang then to her hands folded onto her lap, “We did she stupid shit in this thing.”

“Yeah... We sure did.” She passed a glance over to Blake as she turned the key. The engine roared to life with little hesitation, fuel vapors filling the cab with memories they shared when they were close friends. Before life and school took their places in each other’s lives.

Yang slid the gear shift into reverse as she listened to the rain pat against the steel body of her old truck. Her attention was solid on the drunken hooligans as she backed out from her spot. She could see a smile on Blake’s face now that the truck was moving, “So, uh, am I taking you home or are you going to Adam’s?” The name tasted sour in her mouth the moment it rolled off her tongue. She wished she had a double shot of whiskey to burn it away.

The smile that Blake had seconds ago vanished when his name was spoken, “Home is fine. Adam and I... We split up a few weeks ago... Things just didn’t work out.”

The truck lunged forward to get to the main road. Yang had no idea what had been happening in Blake’s life for a long time since Adam appeared. Her heart felt sore for her friend, who seemed to be hurting deep beneath the surface. “What happened, if you don’t mind me asking.”

Blake seemed hesitant about disclosing that information with her. It didn’t feel like the right time to bring up ghosts that she’s trying to outrun. “I’ll tell you when I’m ready but I appreciate your concern. You’ve always been a good friend to me even if I didn’t feel like I was for you.”

Yang waved off the seriousness of the moment, “That’s what friends are supposed to do. So what if things changed between us, doesn’t mean we can’t pick up where we left off, right?” She looked over to Blake making direct eye contact, then flashed a million dollar smile. “I’ll always have your back no matter what.”

 

~~~~~

 

Rain spread across the windshield by the time the truck came to a slow stop in front of Blake's apartment building. Yang slid the gear shift into neutral, toying with the skull shifter knob, bouncing it side-to-side. The emergency brake was pushed down with her foot followed by a loud cranking sound. Wipers dancing while giving brief moments of clarity to what was in front of them.

The silence eclipsed the soft sound of the radio as Blake observed Yang, who was busy biting on her thumbnail and staring off into the thunderstorm. She began to wonder why she listened to Adam when his jealousy came out to torment her, anger lashing out when she wanted to see her best friend. But, the more she believed she loved him, she chose to satisfy his need and the cost of her own. Yang didn’t  deserve that kind of abandonment and she wished now more than ever to go back and change the path she went down. She wanted to make things better between them. There had been a special spot in her heart for the blonde and no matter what Adam did or tried, he could never get her to fill that hole.

Blake felt like this was destiny that got them to where they were right now, sitting in Yang’s truck that smelled of grease and fuel vapors, a dizzying reminder of what they used to have. She wanted to dance with fate and let the blonde’s flame draw her in where she used to be — where she needed to be — and that was at Yang’s side. 

The rain’s song played its melody on the truck with no sign of letting up anytime soon. Yang shifted in her seat to face Blake a little better, watching the brunette’s expression shift with the truck. “I think we should hang out again. Not like ‘for old times sake’ but actually hang out like how it used to be. I’ve really missed you.”

Blake felt her heart beat as if it were to break through her chest plate. She missed Yang. She really did and now the opportunity was there to be what they once were, “I’d really like that, and... I’ve missed you, too,” she smiled at the blonde who couldn’t help but smile back. “Things just haven’t been the same since... You know.”

“Yeah... I think that’s what happens when people get older,” Yang drummed her fingers against the steering wheel with no rhyme or reason, just to drown out the anxiety building up in her chest. “So... what about tomorrow?”

“I was actually thinking the same thing. I don’t know when I’ll be able to stop by but I’ll text you when I’m free. Is that ok?” Blake unbuckled the seat belt and slowly let it retract, remembering the horrible memories of the buckle hitting her in the mouth.

“Sounds like a plan, Stan,” she replied as Blake brushed her fingers onto the handle. “Have a good night, Blake.”

Blake turned back before she swung the door out into the rain, taking in the soft lavender watching her, “You, too, tiger. Thanks for the ride home.” Before Yang could process the old name she used to be called, Blake had already slammed the heavy door and vanished into the sheet of rain. 

“Sweet dreams, bright eyes.”

 

a/n

Thanks for stopping in and giving this thing a shot! Lemme know what you think! Questions, comments, concerns? Hmu! 


	2. like a fool i call you on a saturday

Yang stirred from a pain in her shoulder contributed from the unreasonable position she slept in on the living room couch. Her eyes slowly adjusted to her bright surroundings as she lifted herself upright. Wiping the drool that puddled on her face with the backside of her hand, she looked at her phone to check the time. It was still early in the day that she didn’t feel like it wasted by sleeping.

She didn’t drink as much as she was hoping to, which was good for her in the long run. There were more times than she could count that she drank past the point of excess but something told her that two drinks would be enough. As long as her gums were numb, she was good. She was surprised she didn’t even make it to her second.

She was halfway through the fire in her cup when she encountered... “Blake.” A grin shined instantly on her face when she remembered she got to spend time with Blake for the first time in what felt like forever. The woman was just as captivating last night as she was when they were twenty. Her eyes, her smile, her laugh... God did she miss that laugh. 

She rubbed her eyes hard enough to see stars then wiped her hands across her face in hopes of waking fully, “I’m such a fucking loser.” Harsh words were directed towards herself but hardly did anything to inflict any damage on her self esteem. She leaned forward with her elbows on her knees while her hands cradled her face. “What the fuck am I supposed to do...”

“Supposed to do about what?” A young voice chimed in behind her.

Yang’s head snapped around towards her sister, who successfully crept up on her. What was he supposed to tell her? That she was attracted to Blake? Maybe everyone knew before her and she was just now finding out for herself.

“Oh, uh, truck stuff,” she lied. Or tried to, anyway. 

“Uh huh, sure,” Ruby was completely unconvinced by her sister’s answer. “So it has nothing to do with Blake, then?”

A brow arched in confusion, not taking her eyes away. Her mouth went dry as if she had been caught committing a felony, “What? Why do you think it has anything to do with her?”

Ruby dropped onto the cushion next to her, pressing her back into the sofa, “I saw you two talking last night.”

“Oh really? Did you tell Weiss too while you were at it?”

The brunette shook her head, “No, it wasn’t my place to tell. Weiss would’ve gone to you and thrown her two cents in and ruin whatever it was goin on.” Her hand fanned at the end of her sentence with a crease in her brow. “I thought it was cute.”

“Cute? Like you and Weiss?” Yang arched her brow with a challenge.

Ruby remained silent while chewing on the inside of her cheek, “How did you know?”

The blonde shrugged, “Word spreads, you sneaky little shit. Why didn’t you tell me?”

Ruby looked away and slid a hand through her dark hair, resting it on the back of her neck, “I wanted to but Weiss wanted to keep it under wraps until she was ready to share it. I respected her wishes even if it included you... I’m sorry, Yang. I’ve wanted to tell you since day one but you know how Weiss can be.” Ruby looked back to her sister expecting her to be mad or disappointed. On the contrary, she was met by sympathetic lavender and affection.

Strong arms embraced the smaller girl, placing a hand on the back of the brunette’s head, “I’m happy for you, Rubes. You’ve been through a lot and deserve nothing but the best. Even if the best for you is _Weiss_ .”

Ruby pulled away, a smile plastered to her face, “She really is...”

Yang ruffled her sisters hair before jumping to her feet. Black and white ripples shot across her eyesight then took a seat seconds into the blood rush. She sat there until her vision returned then attempted another shot of going to the kitchen. 

“So what’s up with you and Blake? You two haven’t been around each other much until ol’ boy took her away from you. I thought you hated her.”

She stopped dead in her tracks by Ruby’s statement, head hanging low. A strong and deep breath filled her lungs before she turned back to Ruby, “I don’t _hate_ her. Sure, I was mad at her for what she did but... I could never _hate_ her.” She turned back towards the kitchen, taking a few steps more to the coffee maker and lifted her mug off the hook it hung from against the backsplash. “He didn’t ‘take her away’ from me. We mutually stopped hanging out because our lives weren’t on the same path. Things happen, Ruby, and people change whether or not we want them to. It’s called life.”

Ruby followed her into the kitchen, resting her elbows on the island table and watched as Yang made her coffee, “Say it however you want but we both know what happened. You weren’t the same for a long time once you stopped hearing from her. I know you’ve missed her and so does she. I’m just glad she dumped the guy after he assaulted her-“

“He what?!” Yang cut her off in a burst of anger. Fists were made and every muscle in her upper body tensed. “What the fuck did he do to her?!”

Ruby had no idea how to react to her sisters anger. It wasn’t like her to fly off the handle so quickly but the information was new and it was powerful, “I take it you didn’t know... fuck.” Her hands covered her eyes in irritation for giving away Blake’s secret.

Yang relaxed, taking in deep breaths to calm her heart rate. She placed her hands on the counter and leaned her weight on them. How was she supposed to take this in? How was she supposed to see Blake without getting upset right off the bat? There were too many questions running through her mind to process them one-by-one. Yang was pissed to the point of tears.

Her eyes remained closed with her head hung low, taking in slow breaths, “How long ago did this happen?”

Ruby stood beside her sister, placing a hand on her bare shoulder, “Two months ago, maybe? We haven’t seen him since Blake pressed charges.”

Yang quickly pushed herself off the counter then made her way to the living room, pacing aimlessly. “I knew there was something about that asshole I didn’t like,” her voice was like a growl, deep and venomous. “I’m supposed to see her today but knowing what I know now, I don’t know how I’m gonna keep my cool.”

“Just be patient with her to tell you. We know how you can be with stuff like this and, believe me, you scare people. She’ll tell you when she’s ready. And when that time comes, she’s going to need you more than ever.”

“Then how is it that you knew and I didn’t?”

Ruby’s eyes fell to the floor at her bare feet, biting her lip to conjure the right words to tell her heated sister, “That’s because... We were there when it happened. Weiss was the one who called the cops and I cleaned the cut-“

Bombs thundered in her ears, eyes instantly drenched red in fury and breaths flaring her nostrils. Pissed was an understatement for how she felt. She disconnected herself from the conversation, turning her back on her sister. Ruby didn’t deserve Yang’s anger. Giving away Blake’s injury was an accident, after all and she was bound to hear it one way or another. It was better to have heard it from the younger girl than unleashing an iota of anger towards Blake. 

The room was silent as Yang padded towards her room, Ruby’s silver refusing to let the blonde escape her sight. She knew she fucked up — royally... The door shut with a soft click and Ruby stood there in complete silence hoping she didn’t open Pandora’s box.

 

~~~~

 

Blake stood in front of her mirror, taking one last look at herself before she felt confident enough to leave the house. She wore a pair of tight black jeans with a black loose fitting, low cut shirt. It hung down a little passed her belt line which was perfect for her taste. She looked down to her boots, checking the fit. The more loose they were, the better. “Here goes nothing... Or everything.”

She dashed to the hallway, swiping her keys off the aluminum console followed by one last look for good measure. Nerves shook through her the more she thought about Yang. She didn’t expect Yang to have matured physically over the course of her absence but the changes were small, yet enough to grasp — the sharp jaw line, her voice sounded deeper than what she remembered, her defined muscles... 

Yang never brought on such strong feelings in the past but now... they’re different than what they were in the past and she had to agree — time has an odd way of changing people. Time and distance apart only made her think of Yang more and the more she thought of her, the more she wanted to be with her. The line that drew ‘wanting to be with her’ and ‘wanting to be _with_ her’ blurred as her relationship with Adam soured. The thought of him, much less that name on her tongue, curdled in her stomach.

She snapped out of her reverie realizing she didn’t remember making it to her car as if she was on autopilot. “I hope I don’t die on the way there.”

The freeway was clear allowing her to open up the old car, engine roaring as the rpm’s climbed, cars standing in place as she passed. It was a reminder of freedom, no longer confined in Adam’s prison and subjected to his mental torture. Under his thumb was a cruel punishment that she still needed answers for why he did it but will probably never receive. It was only a wonder she loved him even after he proved not to be the person he pretended to be. She was an optimistic person, after all.

Her thumbnail rested between her teeth to give her something to do while she sat there behind the wheel, lost in a sea of thoughts. What if she never went to that party despite her original disposition toward Weiss’s pleas? Expectations ran low until she saw the two-toned sunburst orange and silver pickup in the row of half-assed parked cars. There was no mistaking Yang was at the party. She was there in the crowd of strangers, somewhere out there with her unbelievable lilac eyes and charming side smile.

Her heart uncontrollably sped up thinking about the blonde. She didn’t know if she should hate the effect she was under or love it. Either way, she was _fucked_. Metaphorically, that is.

She thought about how her taste in cars was heavily influenced by Yang. Instead of owning a brand new, off the lot car, she had settled for something with a little more character. She got the muscle car a few months prior to the incident with Adam, which she felt that it was part of the reason he did what he did to her. Yang was a huge part of her personality and he felt threatened. It was her weapon against him; it created resentment and jealousy.

Twenty minutes into the drive, she reached the exit meaning she was only a few miles away from Yang. Nerves collided in her chest to the point she felt her heart skip.

Familiar houses passed indicating she was getting close. The more she stressed about it, the sooner she pulled up to the old brick house she remembered sneaking in and out of — sometimes so drunk, that she didn’t remember getting from point ‘a’ to point ‘b’. Yang’s truck was backed in to the driveway like it used to be. Some things never change.

She put the car in park, quickly shutting it off. She took in a few calming breaths before leaving the vehicle. The door slammed shut and she looked ahead at what was to come; the pathway to her future. A few strides across the grass and she was at the door. It swung open before she could rap her knuckles against the dense wood, a sunny blonde standing there with a smile and tired eyes.

“Hey there, stranger. Long time no see,” Yang joked but it came across as the truth. She had to swallow the frog in her throat once she set eyes on the brunette, not expecting her to look the way she did. Everything about her was sinful as fuck. She stepped out onto the porch, avoiding eye contact and ready to hit the road. “Well what do we have here? Did Miss Belladonna get herself a classic? I’m impressed.” The door shut behind her with an awestruck look in her eyes, “You actually got it...” 

Blake moved a lock of hair behind her ear, anxiety creeping up through her limbs. “You said I would look good in a Javelin. Who am I to go against your judgement?”

Yang took her eyes off the treasure in front of her and back to the gem she adored most, “I told you that when we were, like, eighteen.” A smirk crossed her lips, hands sliding into her front pockets. “That was so long ago...”

“You even said it needed to be black,” Blake felt the burn on her cheeks when Yang’s smile deepened. 

They stepped off the concrete to cut across the grass. The closer they approached Blake’s car, the harder Yang studied the classic, “I never would’ve admitted this in the past but... I’m actually pretty jealous.” Her tone teased Blake’s ears, planting seeds of hope.

“Catch!”

Yang barely took heed to Blake’s call but felt the keys peg her in the chest. Her quick reflexes caught them before they fell to the grass, “You’re joking, right?”

Blake took her shades hanging from the front of her shirt and held them in place right below her eyes, radiating the bewitching golden hue, “You know how it goes: you drive, I navigate.”

 

~~~~~

 

Yang had to admit, the old car had a lot of horses and, from what she could feel, a lot of torque to go with it. When she felt like tearing up a clear stretch of asphalt, she would punch the gas just to feel herself sink into the seat. It never failed to make Blake laugh with excitement each time the rush came. These were _Blake’s_ moments. Not possessive ones but the moments that only she could have with Blake. In all actuality, she didn’t want them with anyone else.

She would glance over periodically as if she needed to check on Blake like she was going to disappear from her life again. Instead she would always find her sitting there in content, hair whipping across her shoulders and pink lips etched with a smile. This whole thing felt surreal in the simplest way possible. The sunlight glowed on her sunglasses, the frames glinting a flash gold every time she moved her chin. Every now and then, Blake would catch her staring. Not that she seemed to mind because it would always make her laugh and reply with a ‘what?’

“Nothing. It’s just good to see you smile,” Yang couldn’t lie, especially when it was true. Her smile was precious and something she had missed for the longest time. She reached over and squeezed Blake’s unsuspecting hand before resting it back onto the Hurst shifter. 

She gripped the shifter with one hand and the wheel in the other as she berated herself for doing what she did. Blake wasn’t usually an affectionate person unless she had been drinking. Muscles in her jaw clenched, watching the open road ahead. ‘ _Real_ _fuckin_ ’ _smooth_ , _Xiao_ _Long_. _Reeeeal_ _smooth_.’ The roar of the engine did nothing to lift the silence in the cab, only causing her grip to tighten on the shifter. 

Yang snapped out of her struggle when Blake’s hand slid onto hers, fingers laced together. Heart beats surged as the breath rushed from her lungs. She didn’t remember Blake’s touch being so feather light, yet completely destructive when they were younger. Evidently Blake had little regard of what she was capable of.

"So, uh," she dislodged the frog in her throat before she face-planted on her own words, "how much longer til we get to where we’re goin’?"

Blake's velvet fingertips brushed the blonde’s defined and scarred knuckles when she started to remove her hand, "You remember Knob Hill, don’t you?"

Yang raised a quizzical eyebrow at the adjacent woman, pink faintly instilled beneath the faint freckles along her nose, “Th-that’s where we’re going? I totally forgot about that place.”

“It's been a long time since we've been there and I figured why not," Blake smiled down, studying the hand that was just on Yang's, fingers now curled on her thigh.

 

~~~~~~

 

They stopped at the old gas station off the highway that used to sell them liquor when they were still underage. Yang reminisced the few times she would entice the young clerk with a nugget of weed. Worked like a charm in a small town like that.

Yang set her six pack of tall boys behind her seat then set Blake’s sixer of long necks beside it, “I still don’t know why you still drink that piss-water.” Her eyes shined beneath the dipping sun, tilting the seat back to its original position before sinking into the old leather seat.

“Same as to why you like red beer. Maybe its because I like it. Simple as that.”

A fierce blush painted across the pale skin of her nose, turning away before Blake could see the spell she started to succumb to. Yang knew she wasnt the same girl she was five years ago, much less two. This Blake was more outgoing, more accentuated, more sensual.

"You got me there," she pointed her finger in agreement, opening the throttle as the rocks pinged off the undercarriage and rear quarters panels. Wincing at the noise, she apologized for her overzealous acceleration by recieving a small 'no problem' in return.

Blake shifted to reach behind Yang’s seat, struggling with the angle she found herself in. Yang looked down, catching the sliver of skin exposed by the shirt riding up her torso. If she wasn’t red before, she was red now. Her obliques were tighter than they had been in the past. As the brunette lifted herself back to position, Yang averted her attention back on the road where it should’ve been in the first place.

“Got it,” a victory swept her words, breaking the seal of her bottle cap, dropping the metal into the ashtray that hung from the bottom of the dash by Yang’s right knee. She took a long swig, condensation dripping down onto her black pants. A hiss from the beer sounded when Blake took her lips away from the bottle. She burped under her breath, wedging the clear bottle between the arches of her boots on the floorboard, "Oh, I almost forgot to tell you, make a right when you see the huge boulder leading into the redwoods."

"Thaaaat's right. I was trying to remember where the trail was but it's been so long.”

"I... still come out here from time to time. Usually when I need some time to myself. It makes me remember how things used to be and how things can be.”

Yang closed her eyes and took a deep breath to calm her nerves. There was so much she wanted to say — about everything. She wanted to open a can of worms about how she felt abandoned after all the years they moved from each other. How she didn't have to leave because she had a boyfriend. About how _she_ felt about Blake. It was a roaring tidal wave in the distance of her heart that she knew was soon to hit the shore... it was all a matter of time before she cut the rope and let it happen. "Well, we still have time!" The cheer was an illusion casted upon herself that even she believed it to be real. Hopefully Blake believed it too...

 

~~~~~~

 

They sat on the steel hood, six pack resting on an old hoodie Blake found in her

trunk so it didn’t leave rings on the cowl induction hood. Overlooking the redwood forest, the sky was illuminated by a masterpiece of color that was almost too beautiful to witness. Towards the horizon, oranges blended to pink then the clouds above their heads took on a merciless shade of purple. The sight was sorely missed, remembering when days were easier and filled with happiness. For Yang, they were filled with love. Those days were far behind but seeing Blake beside her, maybe those days were in front of her.

Blake sat upright, nearly touching the windshield, slowly tracing her lips to the edge of the can. The smell of hops filled her senses before taking a drink. It reminded her of nights when there was an energy between that they chose to dance around, almost bringing her to tears thinking of the 'what ifs'. "How's dad doing?" It was all Blake could think of to break the silence.

"He's doing pretty well actually. He’s dating again. Or trying to, that is. I think he’s going through a mid-life crisis or something because he bought a Corvette. But other than that, nothing new with the old man,” Yang fell silent as she remembered how much her dad adored Blake as if the was the best thing since sliced bread — she was though — and wouldn’t shut up about her after they split ways.

“Dad always seemed like the type who would buy something extravagant to impress the women. I’m glad he’s putting himself out there, though...” Yang nodded at Blake’s sentiment. “Even if the car is doing most of the work.”

Yang could only smile because there was no use in denying Blake being right. She always was. She sat in silence, watching the colors drift to a new pallet and sipping the beer that warmed in her hand. She was hesitant to pry into Blake's life. She hadn't been part of it for quite some time so this felt like new and strange territory. Half of her agreed not to ask but the other half weighed more, "Did... Did you finish your degree?”

Blake nodded, "Yeah, it felt like it took forever but I got my bachelors. What about you? Did you end up transferring to a university after your associates?"

"No, I quit going because I got tired of the deadlines and the surmounting debt my degree required. Not only that but I guess I just didn’t have it in me anymore to go," It wasn’t a lie. Just a half-truth. She didn’t have the heart to tell Blake that when she left, she took the part of her that cared. Nothing mattered after that.

“I’m sorry to hear that,” her sight casted downward to the twigs mixing with the dirt. “I really hoped you would’ve transferred to the University of Atlas in Vale. I knew how much you talked about going there for your Mechanical Engineering degree.”

Yang shrugged before finishing off her drink, “Things happen and people change.”

Blake looked at the woman with the feeling that she was the spark that ignited the changes in Yang’s life. There were so many things she didn’t know and understand about her but she was right — people change. 

“Lemme change the subject before I become Debbie Downer...” Yang’s chin set between her thumb and forefinger in thought, "What's the most embarrassing thing you've ever done while having sex?"

She almost choked on her beer by the shameless question bestowed on her. Her drink went down forcefully followed by her winded retort, " _Excuse_ _me_?"

Yang laughed at Blake's modesty, "Do I need to repeat the question?”

"No, Yang. That just came completely out of left field," Blake answered with a lifeless tone, using the back of her hand to wipe away the drink from the edges of her mouth.

The blonde leaned back on the windshield, one hand behind her head, the other resting the tall boy on her knee, "I'll tell you mine, I promise."

"Knowing you, there's nothing embarrassing about what you've done." 

Yang belted a laugh because she knew it was true. There was hardly anything she could declare embarrassing but there was one she was semi-willing to label embarrassing. "You'd be surprised, actually," Yang finished her first beer with a belch that she released into the crook of her elbow. The can crushed in her hand then tossed it in the plastic bag beside their unopened beers.

"Alright, fine. Only, and I do mean _only_ if you tell me yours. And you have to _swear_ you wont laugh.” A finger drew and invisible 'x' on her faded maroon t-shirt. 

She looked over at Yang, who already looked like she was going to burst out into a howling fit, took a deep breath before feeding into the pressure, "Ok, so when I was seventeen, before we had even met, me and this one guy started to _you_ _know_ but apparently my phone was still on the bed... somewhere between the time we started to when we finished, I got four text messages from my mom saying she heard what was going on. She was _pissed_.

"Oh my god! You butt dialed Kali?! I could only imagine how pissed she was. What happened when you got home?" The intrigue in Yang’s eyes made the embarrassment that much more potent.

"I tried to sneak in through my bedroom window but she was already on my bed cornering me with the typical ‘we need to talk’ line. She told me she wouldn't say a word to my dad under the condition that I stopped talking to the guy..."

Yang had turned onto her side, resting her head on her hand and completely indulged with the image of a young Blake before they met, "So, did you stop?"

"Hell yeah, I did! You've met my father! You think I want to be skinned like a cat? Uh, no thank you," she plucked a can from Yang’s stack between them, swiftly cracking it open and passing it over to her. "You look like you could use another."

She took it, accidentally grazing Blake's manicured finger tips, "Thanks." The beer was halfway downed before Blake opened her second.

"It's not a competition, Yang," Blake tried to hide a smile behind her bottle, slowly bringing it her lips. "It's your turn, by the way."

"I doubt I will be able to _top_ that one," she promised she wouldn't laugh but there was nothing said about joking.

Her eyes squeezed shut, pinching the bridge of her nose with a laugh blending overshadowing her annoyance, “Godammit.”

With a beer in one hand and the other flat out, she tried to get Blake to pump the brakes on the irritation, "Okay, okay. Cool your jets, Belladonna. I’ll tell you.” She took a swift drink to soak the arid texture in her throat, then brought the cold drink to her knee. “Last summer, I ran into this girl I had a class with at the community college, who I thought was cute but didn’t expect anything romantic out of it. A few weeks after we started hanging out, things got heavy and the next thing you know, I called her by the wrong name,” she sipped her beer before she could continue. “I, like, shouted that shit. She was pretty pissed and ended up ghosting me.”

Blake’s face went red with the sudden information but looked at Yang’s sheepish grin, “That’s...new.”

Yang replied with a shrug, “It’s more common than you think. I’ve heard of more people saying the wrong name than butt dialing during sex.”

Blake felt like her face was literally on fire by the heat arising from Yang’s immunity to such an intimate conversation. The beer was set to the side, using her hand to nonchalantly cool down her cheeks, “It’s... not that. I... didn’t know you... _liked_ girls.”

“Well, there’s a lot of things you don’t know about me. Had you stuck around, you would’ve found out.”

“Yeah, I get that,” she looked down at Yang’s hang which nervously tapped on her knee. “I hurt a lot of people because I chose Adam over them. What hurts the most is that I chose him over _you_. That was the biggest mistake I’ve ever made,” tears burned in the creases of her eyes. Electricity surged when she felt the hand Yang had been tapping rest over one of her own, gently applying a soothing pressure.

“What’s done is done. I’m not mad at you anymore — haven’t been in a long time but... what matters most is that you’re _here_ and you’re here with me. Okay?” She tightened her grip on Blake’s to illustrate the reality between them. Blake nodded in response, wiping the chilled trail her tear left behind before falling onto her leg.

Yang took her hand from Blake’s, placing a finger under the tiny dent of the woman’s chin, lifting to meet the gold, “We’re gonna be okay. Trust me.”


	3. now i remember what it feels like to fly

Night fell on their drunken fun, forcing them to migrate to the cab for protection against the bugs that swarmed. Yang was surprised by how long a smile stayed on her face as they recounted old memories of them doing things that would’ve given their parents heart attacks had they found out. 

All the small things she adored about the woman beside her swirled in her head the more Blake’s laugh joined the conversation. Aside from the alcohol, the laugh soaked her mind into a stupor. This felt too surreal; being in close proximity with alcohol on their breath, all sense of rationality fading with each sip. Yang wasn’t sure if this was how friend’s were supposed to happen but at this point, she wasn’t in any position to complain.

Stars littered the navy blue canvas above, flickering like the heart in her chest. This wasn’t the result she expected but the girl opposite her didn’t make things any easier. The curl of her lips when she smiled, playfully engrossed in the conversation made her think about the way her eyes gleamed when she laughed at a stupid joke or an embarrassing moment that formerly collected dust in her memory. She could go on about the little things that made it harder to breathe but she needed to focus on not ditching her original plan of

The drive home was somber and hopeful. She wanted this to happen again, not the exact same scenario but something on the lines of being happy with her. And she wanted Blake to feel the same. The road felt like an endless pathway for her mind to swallow the endless possibilities it would allow and everything came back to the quiet woman in the passenger seat.

A magnetic charge drew her eyes to Blake, from what the moon’s shadow described, had fallen asleep midway through the trip back to Vale. She had to force herself to breathe at the sight of Blake’s stark featured soaked in moonlight. Her fingers drifted from the shifter her hand rested on to carefully dismiss the hair that fell over Blake’s peaceful complexion. She wanted to fully see the calming storm beside her.

It took every ounce of will power to not kiss Blake between laughter and the stories of the past. That was then but what about now? Deep down she knew there was an intangible barrier she needed to respect in regards to Blake’s trauma with Adam. The cut Ruby recalled... what was that about? She didn’t see one. Maybe it healed enough to not notice.

She gripped the wheel, knuckles white from the bone beneath, wondering what Blake went through with him. She should’ve been there for her — tried calling or leaving a text to show her that she was still there but... she didn’t. She stayed in the pit Blake dug for her and never tried to climb out to find her. Maybe she was part of the blame for how things continued to be. She had to be there for her  _now_ . Blake needed someone to support her and build her back into the woman she once was and she could see the cracks for its face value.

“I can fix a lot of things, Blake, but I don’t know how to fix a broken heart,” Yang whispered to the sleeping figure resting against the door panel.

The apartment building came into view, pulling into a visitor spot closest to her door. She killed the car, yanking the keys from the column and adjusted herself to face the brunette. “Hey, Blake,” her hand gently rested on her shoulder, giving an easy nudge to wake her up. “C’mon, wake up, babe — er—Blake. We made it to your apartment.” Nothing but an irritated groan escaped Blake’s sinuses as she moved herself off the door panel to a more comfortable position upright. Yang knew this mood from their early days. This was a side of Blake not to be tested. “Gonna play this game, huh? Fine by me.”

She quickly got out of the old car, hinges singing with age as she swung the door open. The bucket seats had molded perfectly to her body and were comfortable enough where she really didn’t want to leave. The steel door closed as quietly as possible to move around to the other side. She had sobered up before leaving Knob Hill and now she was completely there only her mind was clouded with sleep and Blake.

The thumb button on the handle popped the door open, exposing Blake to the chilled April air. Yang stood there, hands on her hips, taking in the sight of a pitiful looking Blake. She bent down to scoop the woman into her arms, one hand across her back and the other sliding behind her knees. Blake’s cheek propped on Yang’s shoulder, breath heating the skin of Yang’s neck, causing her to hold the sleeping woman closer. Her mind was traveling down a path it shouldn’t be but... she wanted — has always wanted — Blake to be hers... not Adam’s.

She shut the steel door in place with her boot then made her way to the closing of her night. Boots slid across the concrete, delaying the inevitable, holding onto Blake for a few seconds longer.

Using the toe of one of her boots to knock, she waited a few seconds, a grin spreading across her face once the sound of a disgruntled Weiss on the other side came closer. The blue door swung open in anger but Weiss’s attitude changed once she saw the two in front of her, “What’s this?” She stepped aside allowing the pair’s entrance into the cold apartment.

Yang chuckled, “Special delivery.”

~~~~~

The moment she came to, her room was already painted with a dark orange of the sunrise. Blankets sprawled around her, waking up exposed to the cool air and still in the clothes she wore the day prior. She couldn’t recall how she got to her bed or home for that matter. “Fuck,” she whispered into her pillow. A level of sadness entered her chest having fallen asleep in the car last night. It never failed she would pass out in the dark after a few drinks. She hated her tolerance level.

She lifted herself, head spinning briefly before pitifully standing on weak legs, hand reaching out to her bedside table. Fingers bumped against her black scroll, eyes drawn to the blue light blinking every few seconds. She held onto the table and picked up the device in her free hand. Her thumb drew the pattern, unlocking the scroll to reveal a message from Yang. A smile instantly brightened her face, instantly lifting the fog in her brain. She honestly couldn’t remember the last time she received a ‘good morning’ text that made her this excited.

_ “ Good morning, bright eyes! Hope you slept well :)” _

__

Her heart felt like it seized briefly realizing how much she missed that name. Yang was the only person who got away giving her a pet name, aside from her parents, until she met Adam. His choice of words made her feel beautiful and wanted until she discovered that they were just that — words. Nothing else.

She wanted more than anything to feel love in every sense of the word and to have it reciprocated. Enough time passed in her relationship with Adam when it clicked in her head that Adam _truly_ didn’t  love her. It made her evaluate her life and what she gained — what she wanted and  she discovered, Adam wasn’t even in her future.

Adam controlled her in everything she did, claiming he knew what was best for her. It didn’t take long for her to believe him and it took, what felt like forever, to realize, he was completely wrong.

The only person who ever let her be herself without any limits was Yang... the more she thought about it, the more her chest swelled.

She fell back onto the cool sheets in defeat, unsure about how to wrap her head around the feelings she’s tiptoed around. Sure, she loved Yang but was she...  _in_ _love_ with her? The feeling was familiar but not entirely the same from what she thought she felt for Adam in their early days but... this was  _different_ . Her hand reached over to the royal purple pillow and smothered herself in a vain attempt to relieve her frustration, suppressing the scream in her throat.

After a few seconds of torturing herself via suffocation, she half-ass tossed the pillow back to its original spot and laid there in the the clouds, floating in her irresolution. A smile broke out thinking about the woman with an infectious, sunny disposition. It was impossible to be in a horrible mood when Yang was on her mind.

A knot tangled in her chest, attempting to consume her the more she thought about the blonde and everything about her. That knot was what Blake couldn’t describe, she didn’t know what to call it but she knew it was  _something_ . She knew it was only a matter of time before she could give it a name. The only thing she knew right now was that, whatever it was, was waiting on her heart to decide.

~~~~~

Weiss sat at the kitchen table, holding her warm mug in both hands as she watched Blake escape the steam in the hall bathroom. Her hair spread like ink across the shoulders and back of a familiar red and yellow high school t-shirt she knew didn’t belong to Blake. Her bare feet stuck to the hardwood floor with each step as she padded toward Weiss, pushing back the wet bangs out of her golden eyes. She took the chair across from her roommate and plopped down in exasperation.

“I see you drank too much last night. We all know you’re a light weight but yet you still drank yourself under the table,” Weiss lifted the cup to her chin, blowing the upon the surface. “Classic Blake.”

Blake propped her elbows onto the table, holding her head in her hands, fingers massaging her temples, “I was a bit too overzealous with the beer last night. I think I just drank them too quickly.”

“You should know better than to keep up with  Yang .” Blake looked at Weiss the moment she dropped the blonde’s name, a mischievous grin arose once they made eye contact. Blake had no rebuttal to the statement, needing to keep her nerves in check.

Weiss continued. “You were out like a light last night. She brought you inside and tried to put you to bed,” she looked at Blake who seemed to be focused on a spot on the table, “but _someone_  latched  onto the blonde in question and wouldn’t let her go.” Blake felt her eyes grow wide and throat went dry in embarrassment. She got up from her spot and made her way to the fridge for a cold bottle of water, cracking the cap and slammed roughly half in one sitting. What she really wanted was to nurse a a fifth of vodka and forget this stupid conversation ever happened. Heat burned the tips of her ears, traveling down the back of her neck. She reared back and finished the rest of the ice cold water to no relief.

“Hide it all you want, Blake, but we all know you like her, except Yang herself,” the mug Weiss was holding was now on the table. She turned to watch Blake’s meltdown with a smile plastered on her face. “I don’t know what’s holding you back at this point.”

Blake’s eyes met ice blue, “It’s not that easy, Weiss...”

“So you  _do_ like her, then?”

Blake stared at her, realizing she actually confessed to something. She crossed her arms over her chest, shrinking into herself. “Didn’t you just say you already knew?”

Weiss shrugged then went back to her mug to sip her victory, “Yes but I just wanted to hear you say it.”

“I hate you so much right now.”

“You don’t hate me. You just hate that I’m right.”

Blake went for a second water bottle then back to her seat. She sat down carefully as if she was about to detonate. “So... how long have you known?”

Weiss slid her mug a few inches away after finishing what was left of her coffee, “I think the question you need to ask is: how long have  _you_ known.”

Her brows furrowed with bewilderment, unable to clearly answer her question. Yang was her favorite person since the day they met the summer after high school and since then, she always wanted to be around her. Was that when? Was it when Yang started dating one of her classmates with blue hair their freshman year of college, whose name she couldn’t remember... She remembered being slightly jealous of the guy when Yang chose to invest her time with him instead and only a few hours with her on the weekend. That’s probably how Yang felt when Adam arrived and slowly pushed her out of the picture.

Looking back towards the happier days, Yang didn’t ever try to convince her that her flaws needed to be fixed. Yang would always play on them by joking about them yet, she would point them out as if they were the most s cherished attributes she had.

She hated herself for leaving Yang in the dust.

Weiss watched the expressions of her eyebrows shift as the gears in Blake’s mind revolved, “A long time, I take it.”

Golden eyes shot back to Weiss, stunned by her own discovery. She nodded her head in a agreement, biting her bottom lip in the process, “I think I’ve always known... maybe admitting is the first step moving forward, right?”

“Blake, we’re not talking about AA,” Weiss laughed by how brain dead Blake was when her mind was saturated with Yang. She saw first hand from the beginning, how Blake was a completely different person around the boisterous blonde, always keeping her close and never taking their eyes off one another. For how smart they were, they were so stupid to figure it out.

“I know, I know. But it’s true, though. Maybe I needed to admit to liking her first before I do something stupid... like actually  _tell_ _her_ .”

Weiss reached across the table, placing her hand on Blake’s for support. She could sense the trepidation within her and didn’t want her to spin out, “I don’t think it would be stupid but I believe you might be overthinking what you should do. Thinking you already know the answer isn’t going to help you resolve this.  _I_ think you already know how she feels towards you. You’ve probably been too oblivious to see it.”

Blake sat there, taking all of Weiss’s words to heart. She knew Weiss was right — about all of it. A gentle squeeze of Weiss’s hand gave her a fraction of the courage needed to say something to Yang but for now, she wanted to take her time and enjoy the weight no longer crushing her. “Thanks, Weiss...”

She slid the chair away from the table to make her way to her room. There was a message she needed to respond to.


	4. lost love is sweeter when it’s finally found

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologize in advance if there’s words running together... I’ll be the first to admit I’m the WORST editor but I’m blaming the upload thingy on this *shrugs*

Yang hated Sunday. Sure, she liked he idea of being off for one more day but it felt like the prelude to another life-draining work week she would come to hate by Wednesday. The shop she worked at had been grating on her for months causing her to lose all motivation to get out of the rut she was in. There was too much riding on this job though. Supporting Ruby so she could invest her time in her studies for her Biomedical Science degree was the most important thing at his moment. Quitting and leaving everything in limbo could jeopardize what they had going.

The tv had nothing to fully sink into and there wasn’t anything on the streaming services she was dying to see. She could rewatch The Office for the fourth time but Ruby would complain with ‘ _again_ ?’. Nothing interested her but there she sat, in the presence of her sister who, by the look on her face, was enthralled by the explanation and visual process of pulling wisdom teeth. Yang could only scrunch her nose in disgust, remembering when she got her pulled. It was the noises that sent chills down her spine. She would rather watch this than The Office? Please.

She read the time on the cable box then immersed her into the cushions of the couch, arms crossed over her chest, feet propped on the coffee table, “Why the _fuck_ are we watching this?” Her annoyance did little to pacify her sister.

Ruby looked over from her spot on the recliner, “Is it too much for you? Oh, wait, I forgot, you cried like an overgrown toddler just from the sight of the instruments.” Sarcasm weighed more than the breath used while smirking at her sister. Yang thoroughly looked unamused.

“Yeah, yeah. Let’s throw _that_ in  my face again...” She glared at the tv, as the narrator continued the lecture of different methods for removing impacted teeth. “It’s not my fault I got the shitty end of the gene pool.”

The scroll on the cushion beside her lit up briefly before turning dark again. Her stomach flipped hoping it was Blake. She gave herself a few seconds to calmly take the device, not to give Ruby the assumption she was too eager for whoever was on the other line. The scroll unlocked to see Blake actually replied to her message from this morning.

_“Morning, tiger :) kill me, please”_

An invigorating smile shined on her face remembering the immodestly intriguing conversations that hung in the wind chill, wanting to taste the intoxicating arousal hinted on her tongue. The lewd topics spoken only by the courage floating in her bottle, Blake beckoned her to a ledge with the choice of falling or keeping her feet on the ground. In all honesty, she never wanted to touch the ground again. It was over for her the moment she came back into her life. 

Heat rose under her skin, nerves scraping across her disintegrating rationality like metal on metal. She was now at Blake’s mercy, having already surrendered to the spell she was bound to. A schism between a dream and reality grasped in the palm of her hand, blessed with the power to crush her if she truly wanted to.

Figuring what to reply with was a challenge. She didn’t want to send something that could’ve been read out of context. Coming up with something cliché was easy but she wanted to avoid that. Blake was the farthest person from being cliche.

_                              “ You know I could do no such thing. You’re too cute for that.” _

The message sent and now she waited, everything around her was blocked from her senses except for the device she laid on her thigh. Before she could get a grip on herself, the scroll vibrated. She swallowed then unlocked the screen.

_“Then what would you suggest for this headache?”_

A smile broke out on her face at the fact that Blake seemed to play along.

_“Oh, I dunno. I’m sure there’s something I could do to make you feel better. Cuddles, maybe?“_

Waters couldn’t be tested just a toe, she had to dive in recklessly without a second thought. With each calming breath passed through her like a siren’s song, erratic beats pumped in her chest making her want to throw up. The faint line her feet tread upon, blended in with the dirt of insignificance. She wanted that line gone from the equation.

“What are you smiling about over there?” A cheeky voice pierced her ears, hinting at something incriminating.

Snapping her attention from the scroll to her sister like her was caught with her hands in the cookie jar, Yang cleared her throat as a quick lie formed in her mouth, “Oh, uh, Pyrrha sent me a pretty good meme. Wanna see it?” She opened her gallery, finding one at random, ready to fire.

“You’re a horrible liar, Yang.”

“I’m serious! Look!” Yang showed the screen to Ruby hoping to sway her in another direction. Last thing she wanted was any assumptions or questions regarding Blake when she had no answers herself.

Ruby’s eyes narrowed, looking at the scroll then back to her sister, “You’ve shown me that one. And by the way, Blake just messaged you back.” Lavender eyes widened from being caught, slowly bringing the scroll back to herself. “You should know that I’d be happy about you two hanging out again. I missed having her around,” her eyes locked onto Yang’s, “I don’t know why you have to lie about it. Especially to me...”

The inside of her cheek felt raw by how much she was chewing on it. She gave Ruby credit for how observant she was, without exuding the notion she cared for such things. “You’re right, Rubes, I shouldn’t lie to you about it. I guess I’m getting used to the fact that she wants to be back in my life. This whole thing feels weird, y’know?”

Ruby nodded, understanding Yang’s perspective by the sudden shift in Blake’s return to her life. Unlike Yang, Ruby saw Blake more frequently when she went to visit with Weiss. Blake wasn’t the same woman she used to be when she was still involved with Yang, both engraving each other into their lives. It took so much restraint not to talk about her sister around the brunette and the same with Yang about Blake. She wanted to just tell Yang about how well Blake was doing in her job. She wanted to share the books Blake had been reading from day-to-day, the smallest changes in her appearance, how she looked unhappy with Adam when he was around...

She always hoped something romantic would happen between them — not the estrangement they experienced. Yang was always the happiest when Blake was around yet brooded when not. That’s how she knew they were meant for each other. That’s how she knew Yang was in love with her best friend.

“Where did you guys go to yesterday? Anywhere fun?”

She looked at her scroll desperately wanting to read Blake’s message but composed herself enough to reply, “We drove out to Knob Hill and drank some beer for old time’s sake. That’s basically it.”

The recliner jolted as Ruby adjusted in her seat, “Basically? Did she tell you about what happened?”

Yang shook her head in modesty, “No, not yet. I wanted to bring it up but... I couldn’t. I’m not gonna try and push the envelope.” A dry smile showed through the sadness she felt by Blake withholding something  that  important.

“Then...  what did you  guys talk about?” Her eyes shined genuine enthusiasm, hand under chin.

“Boy! Someone’s nosey today,” Yang’s smile grew in size looking down at the scroll, still dying to see the message. “If you  _must_ know, it was mostly risqué stuff. Like, I told her about what happened with Magnolia... I just left out the part about it being Blake... Unfortunately you heard it. Hell, I wouldn’t doubt if the neighbors lit a cigarette afterwards.” Yang buried her face in her rough hands, remembering the events of that night and Ruby avoiding her for an entire week.

“Blake is pretty tasteless when she’s drunk, though. She told me about last summer when  she went to the beach with some friends  when dickhead was out of town, she lost a bet and had to streak in front of, like, thirty people. I remember her being modest and not so...  _audacious_ .” An unknown side of Blake ran through her mind. An image of waves gracing her untamed flesh, sand clinging to her in sin, sun releasing the vibrant color in the golden flakes of her eyes...

Ruby laughed because she heard the same story shortly after it happened, “I think you had something to do with that. Lord, you were such a bad influence on her.”

“Eh,” she shrugged at the accusation with a sense of pride that her character rubbed off on the girl of her dreams. “I’m proud that she has the confidence to do it.”

They stayed silent for a few seconds, glancing at the tv. Yang was thrilled the show ended because she was tired of documentaries for the day. She got up and snatched the remote from Ruby’s side table and scrolled through the guide. Once she found something to annoy her sister with, she picked up he scroll to reply to Blake’s message.

_“Just cuddles? No aspirin?”_

_“Maybe. I think cuddles from me could kill a headache before the aspirin would.”_

_“I’d like to see how well they work first hand.”_

Ruby glanced over to her sister who’s color drained from her face as if she saw a ghost, “Ok, seriously. What’s going on?”

“N-nothing! It’s just Blake being, well, Blake!” The fakest yet most anxious laugh erupted over the laughter on the television.

“Bullshit! I know something’s going on! You have that stupid look on your face!”

Yang chuckled under her breath by how nosey Ruby was. “I think Blake might be, uh, hitting on me? Maybe?” Her hand scratched the back of her neck then slid down to her lap. “You know me. I’m not very perceptive with these things... I think that’s why I blew it the first time.”

Ruby’s silence meant she was taking in the information and processing an answer. She knew her sister was wiser than most gave her credit for. Maybe that’s why she decided to finally confide in the younger girl about her twisted emotions. “I think that’s why she started dating Asshole Adam — because I was too dense to see   _her_. ” She formed a fist in her lap then blew upwards to push her bangs out of her eyes, “We wouldn’t be here in the first place if I just fucking told her I loved her—“ She stopped her tangent in its tracks and covered her mouth with both hands. Her attention shifted back to Ruby whose eyes were as wide as her own, both surprised by the sudden confession.

“Fuck...” Her hands shifted to drape her eyes, rolling thunder of emotion beat against every nerve. The word brought everything into focus, feeling more like an idiot for not being able to admit sooner that what she harbored over the years was  love  and not  like.  Love made her jealous of Adam. Love made her shut down when Blake left her. Love made her want to hold Blake in her arms, who slashed her way through her heart.

“I knew it! I _fucking_ knew it!” Ruby leapt from her chair, feeding the embarrassment to Yang by the spoonful. “So... does that mean you’re gonna tell her?” Ruby’s antics seized long enough to catch the full sight of a flustered Yang, who’s face was covered with her hands to hide the crimson hue of all the blood rushing to her cheeks.

Her eyes peered over her hand to look at her joyous sister then back under its cover, “No, Ruby. I’m not.”

“Why not? You have to tell her!” Hands flailed with confusion, emphasizing how serious the younger girl was.

She sat straight up, placing her elbows on her knees then sank her face into her hands. I was harder dealing with her feelings after admitting than it was when it was kept to herself. “I don’t think I can... what makes you think I could tell her now when I couldn’t back then?” Her voice was muffled behind her shaking hands. It took all her strength to not break down in front of her sister. She usually brimmed with confidence but the very thought of a rejection from Blake brought her to her knees. She was putty in Blake’s delicate hands and she had the power to destroy her.

Ruby apprehensively crossed the room, conscientiously avoiding any sudden contact. She had no clue how to comfort and persuade an emotionally compromised Yang about anything. Especially when it was Yang who always did the comforting. An apprehensive hand lightly rested on the blonde’s shoulder, feeling the woman shiver instantly by the contact, “It’s ok, Yang. You don’t have to do anything you’re not comfortable doing. And I’m sorry for pressuring you...”

Yang took hold of Ruby’s hand, “It’s not that I’m uncomfortable — believe me, I want to tell her — it’s just...” She took in a deep, uneven breath then exhaled just as strong before resuming, “Just when I thought I was over her, she shows up and all I do is welcome her back like nothing happened. I’m losing grip on everything I’ve been holding in for the last two years. Then she starts sending me messages that brings everything on harder and  _stronger_ —  how am I supposed to handle that? How, Ruby?”

The hand that was on her shoulder joined the other to bring Yang in for a hug — one reinforced with the sisterly bond that Yang couldn’t deny. She held on tight as if her life depended on Ruby’s strength, sinking her forehead into the crook of the smaller girl’s neck. “You don’t have to do anything, Yang. You really don’t. Just take all the time you need to sort it out. You never know, she might feel the same way and has probably been too scared to say it.“

Yang held on tighter after Ruby spoke, binding fists on the gray shirt against the girls back. Everything she ever doubted and questioned about Blake, fell through the cracks replacing the darkness with a beaming sliver of hope.


	5. reckless abandon like no ones watching you

Loud footsteps slapped the concrete leading to Blake’s door, clearing the set of three in one bound. Breath heavy in her lungs, she pushed her bangs back and took in one last breath before pounding three times on the door like a cop. Waiting was the hard part because, honestly, she had no idea if Blake was going to be as receptive as her with unexpected company. She didn’t text ahead of time since she wanted to surprise her.

Seconds felt like minutes as anxiety took hold of her emotions but still held on to faith she would appear. Her car wasn’t in direct sight. She didn’t even know where exactly she parked. A garage maybe? The complex offered but did she have one? One more thing she wanted to know and probably needed to if she was coming around more.

The lock on the door rattled before the door opened to reveal a very surprised Blake, still dressed in an over-sized shirt and shorts barely visible beyond the lengthy top. Yang would’ve assumed she wasn’t wearing any if she didn’t know the woman. Modesty was one of Blake’s middle names next to cordial, prudence and humble.

“Yang? What’re you doing here? Shouldn’t you be at work?” Blake moved aside to let Yang pass her.

She kept her hands in her front pockets, eyes scouring to see what she couldn’t a few days ago. From what she could tell, Weiss ran the apartment because most of the decor didn’t even match Blake’s personality. She had to admit though, Weiss had good taste. “I got the day off. Figured I could come and bother you if that’s alright.” She noticed the shoes in the hallway giving her the queue to slip off her converse, moving them with her toes to match the orderly pairs lining against the wall.

“You could never bother me, Yang. I’m glad you came by though... I was starting to get bored,” Blake wandered to the kitchen with Yang in tow, lavender eyes traveling along the lean muscle in the woman’s legs, unhealthy imagination forcing its way in.

As Blake made it to the fridge, Yang leaned her shoulder against the entry way, arms crossed. Muscles in her forearms flexed the more she watched the woman, especially when she was slightly bent over as she pulled out a water bottle and held it for Yang to see, “Want one?”

She nodded, unable to speak from the torrid sensation in her throat. The water was tossed across the kitchen and Yang easily caught it with one hand then cracked the cap to soothe her dry throat, “Thanks, B.” As cold as what the water was, it did little to satisfy the problem. No matter how much she tried to keep her eyes off Blake, they went right back to her.

“You’re welcome. Help yourself to whatever you’d like,” her eyes lit up with a smile as she walked back towards Yang, sipping on her water.

Blake had no idea the implications of what ‘help yourself to whatever’ meant.

Her head craned as Blake walked past, her citrus shampoo hitting her senses like a ton of bricks. She stood at the entrance of the hallway leading to the room, hitching her thumb backward, “I’m going to change real quick. I won’t be long.”

Before Yang could protest, because she didn’t mind the choice of attire at all, Blake had already disappeared down the hall. She cluelessly meandered the living room, dragging her feet on the soft, arctic blue carpet. Her eyes were drawn to the artificial flora decorating along the crown molding above. ‘ _That’s_ definitely _Weiss_.”

She took in the pictures strategically placed upon the walls — some generic prints, some mementos of the past. A past memory made its way to her when she found something unexpected. She chuckled beneath her breath, eyes squinting as a smile blossomed at the old picture — a candid shot of Blake and herself at a carnival when they were closing in on their twenties. Her hand rested on the smaller girls back, leading her to the Ferris wheel. That memory struck her hard... she was in love with Blake then, and she was too stupid to see it.

She backed away from the picture, foolish to believe those were the happiest days of her life, not realizing then that those days would come to an end. When she heard the door open, she turned away to nonchalantly look around as if she hadn’t seen a ghost from her past. Blake returned in something a lot less presumptuous, a blue and green flannel button up and a pair of ungodly tight jeans, dark hair falling over her shoulders... There was no way Yang could function with Blake flaunting those legs amongst other things...

“I assume you wanted to go somewhere, right?” Blake asked as she began rolling up the sleeve of her shirt, golden eyes mischievously connecting with lavender.

Yang cleared her throat before she spoke, “Y-yeah. I mean, we don’t have to if you don’t wanna. Hanging out here is totally cool.”

Blake couldn’t help but let out a feather light laugh, “I did not change all for you to back out.” She stood a few feet from Yang, eyeing her like she was trying to disarm the woman.

“There’s nowhere in particular I thought of going but I might have an idea — only if you’re up to it.”

“Okay and where’s that?” Her veins ignited with what was happening before her eyes. Yang was turning into an absolute mess. From the way her eyes diverted, the clenching of her jaw, the pink hue on the bridge of her nose — maybe Weiss was right after all. Perhaps Yang really like her.

She stepped closer to the blonde to test her boundaries. With each inch advanced, Yang took that much space away.

Yang stood with her back metaphorically against the wall looking down at a brazen Blake, wondering what got into her all of a sudden. “I, uh, figured we could, uh, go see a movie or something.”

With a smile spread wide on her lips as she backed away to give Yang some space to breathe, “That sounds fun. I’m kind of curious what ‘or something’ is. Did you have _something_ else in mind?”

A nervous laugh was all Yang could muster having to look away from Blake’s intimidatingly strong eyes, knowing full-well what she was doing and lord it was working. Yang was powerless against them, “Whatever you’d like to do, I guess?” Yang shrugged at her lame answer, “I dunno.”

Blake backed off, leaving Yang in shambles then dropped onto the leather couch, crossing her legs without taking her eyes away, “As long as I’m with you, I don’t care what we do.”

“Is that so?” Her bravery started to come back in small bursts, crossing her arms over her chest. “I think I have just the right thing in mind.”

~~~~~

They pulled into the local park a few blocks away from Blake’s apartment, trees shedding white blossoms and the air smelling sweet of fresh pollen. It was enough to kill Blake’s sensitive allergies but she was willing to suffer to be with Yang and whatever she had planned. Every second was worth it.

Yang killed the engine and reached behind Blake’s seat, pulling out a bag that highly resembled a lunch box and flashed a quick smile before dipping out of the truck. Blake followed suit, slamming the door a little harder than expected. A habit she developed from her old car.

She followed the blonde, hair ablaze between the speckles of shade from the tree cover. Twigs and dead leaves littered the sides of the trail they ventured on all while trying not to trip over protruding roots.

“C’mon, slowpoke! Don’t let me leave you in the dust!” She called over her shoulder to Blake, who fell behind further and further against Yang’s wider gait.

She felt a challenge arise, picking up her pace into a jog to catch up only to see Yang do the same and muttered under her breath, “Asshole.” She was one of the few people who could get away with such affection as name calling, which usually made Yang laugh. And vise-versa. It was how they knew their bond was that strong.

Yang was off to a full sprint, dodging saplings growing in the trail and roots but Blake’s feet were stealthy compared to Yang’s, quickly catching up without notice. She clenched her fingers around the strap crossing Yang’s body, jerking her backwards to a stop.

Out of breath, Yang laughed the best she could at Blake’s figure hunched over while collecting her breath, “When did... you... get so fast?”

“When did you get so slow?” Blake said in one solid breath before dropping her head to breathe. “You’re an asshole, you know that right?”

Yang laughed beyond her lungs striving for oxygen, “Of course but I’m only an asshole to you.”

“How mature.”

Yang walked over and held her hand for Blake, which she gladly took to hold herself up. She was aware she was out of shape, realizing she needed to get back to some sort of physical activity. “It’s part of the charm. You should know this by now.”

Blake shook her head in disbelief, “Lord, you’re so full of yourself.” She could feel her breathing return and the sweat dry on her hairline.

Yang shrugged then remembered she still had Blake’s hand in hers, heat growing within the grip. She had no clue if she should keep it or let it go. She figured Blake would’ve let go by now but was surprised she hadn’t. Her body moved forward for the other woman to follow, heading a little farther up the trail. “It’s up here. Just a little bit to go.” Yang couldn’t tell if the heat rising from her neck was from the sprint or from Blake’s effect. She figured it was the latter of the two.

Blake gripped her hand a little more firmly which kept Yang from unknowingly leaving her behind. She had always been an anchor in mind, body and spirit. That was one of the few things she loved about Blake. The thought of love drew a sideways grin on her face. Thankfully Blake couldn’t see it.

They reached a flat concrete platform that measured roughly six feet by four feet and Blake was a little confused as to what was going on. Yang took the bag from across her shoulders and set it on the concrete, unzipping it in a smooth motion to produce an organized row of discs in various colors.

“What’s this? Are we playing frisbee or something?” Blake looked down at Yang as she pulled them out a few at a time, inspecting each one.

Yang chuckled at Blake’s response, moving some to one side, organizing them in a way Blake didn’t understand, obviously amused by her, “Are we playing frisbee or something... Blake, this is disc golf. It’s fun, trust me.”

“How do you play?” Blake set her hands on her hips, meeting Yang’s glinting eyes as they caught a bit of sunlight.

She rose from her spot towering Blake by a few inches, “It’s basically golf but with discs. It’s basically scored the same — the lower the number the better. Do you know anything about golf?”

Blake shook her head no giving Yang the prompt to continue, “Instead of a hole, you make your disc into the basket,” she pointed across the field to the basket out in the open hoping Blake could make out the object, “in the least amount of shots possible. I personally don’t score numerically because it sours the game. I just play for fun.”

“Seems easy enough,” Blake replied in a cocky tone hoping to get a rise out of Yang.

Yang picked up a stack of three discs for Blake to see one-by-one, “You have three different discs: a driver, a mid-range and a putter. Putters are used for a close shot of the basket. This,” she lifted the driver, “is for long range attempts when you launch. The mid-range is used when you’re trying to gain distance to the basket, if you feel the need to use it. I’ve made a basket in two shots with a mid-range and holy shit, it was awesome.”

She passed the discs to Blake and picked up another stack for herself, “If you don’t like the way those, feel free to switch them out.”

Blake was surprised to learn something new about the woman and would’ve never thought she was into something like this.

Yang continued her tutorial by showing her how to grip the disc and how it’s thrown then giving small details watching Blake show genuine interest in her hobby, who asked questions in between.

“Alright, Blakey! Ready to bang some chains?”

~~~~~

By the time they made it halfway through the back-nine, Blake made mention of being hungry in which Yang couldn’t protest. For Blake’s first time playing, she was surprised by how quickly she picked up on the sport. Pride filled her chest.

Yang watched every movement the woman made, sometimes getting caught red-handed in the act. Blake didn’t comment but only smiled at her causing a blush to strike her features. She wanted to climb into a hole and never come out. She was pretty sure Blake had a sixth sense of picking up on stuff like that.

Yang took the discs from Blake all while giving her grief for the disc she lost in a tree, claiming it to be one of her favorites. Blake drifted away from her, looking at the colors through the trees as the sun made its descent. Without warning, Yang bumped her arm with her elbow, “Ready to get out of here?” Blake nodded and followed Yang down the trail that lead them to the park.

“You’re pretty good at disc golf,” Yang said over her shoulder, gripping the strap from falling. “Are you sure you haven’t played before?”

Blake kept pace with despite her slightly shorter legs. The hand at her side nearly touched Yang’s with each step but fear kept her from taking it. The thought went back and forth, always coming back to ‘ _don’t_ ’. “I haven’t even heard of it ‘til today.”

“We should totally play more often! You’re a natural!” That boosted her confidence by a hair but not as much as she’d like.

She concentrated on the incline of the rough trail before her foot caught a bulging rock, “I’d like that. Just let me know whe—“ Her shoe caught on to what she tried avoiding the second she took her mind off of it. She fell forward but was immediately caught by Yang’s calloused hand around her wrist, face suspending inches away from a rock. With ease, Yang lifted her up like she weighed mere pounds hardly showing any signs of physical exertion. When she stood clearly on her own two feet, she looked up to meet Yang’s severe lilac, heart racing as she was less than a foot away from a set of pink lips. She was in serious trouble.

She tried to take her hand back but Yang — this time — refused to let go. Fighting was fruitless so she relaxed, adjusting to the rough surface of her mechanics hand. Fingers released but slid down to intertwine their fingers. Yang’s pulse transferred through skin and Blake could count them if she chose.

“You should be more careful, bright eyes. I can’t have you falling for me,” Yang winked at her, hand tightening on Blake’s. ‘ _Goddamnit_.’

Yang kept Blake’s hand in hers the rest of the way down to the truck with minutes to spare before the sun disappeared for the day. The second they separated she immediately wanted it back. Her door opened slowly while lost in thought of what she should do. She wanted to tell Yang _everything_ but the thought alone sent a shiver down her spine.

Now she was stuck in the cab alone with the woman who was calm as a cucumber, who periodically glanced over and sent smiles of assurance at her. For the first time in her life she felt like she loathed Yang for how calm she could be.

Without so much as a sound, she felt the same calloused hand cover hers, thumb brushing across her prominent knuckles. Blake looked over to see a grin on the woman’s face as she looked ahead to pull out of the parking lot. It was such a light expression, it was enough to set her on fire. Yang was probably paying her back for what happened at the apartment but this... didn’t feel like fun and games. This felt real.

Blake shifted her hand upward, eager to feel her skin directly, then slowly laced their fingers as a test. Instead of protesting, Yang tightened her grip enough to agree. Blake looked back to Yang who turned to meet her gaze, intoxication clouding the lavender, swearing her eyes were almost maroon. ‘ _It’s_ _probably_ _the_ _twilight_ ,’ she thought to herself.

The rest of the drive involved a comfortable silence between them, radio providing a white noise in the background while adjusting to the sensation of the others hand in theirs. Blake’s heart sank once her complex came into view indicating her day with Yang was over but held on until the moment came when she needed to let it go.

Yang backed into a spot across the way from Blake’s door and put it into park, unsure of what to do at this point. Hands still bonded together, Yang turned slightly in her seat, meeting Blake’s eyes that reflected the lights in the cab but could still picture the gold she never forgot for two years. “I really had fun today,” her voice was soft and free of any sarcasm or jokes.

“Yeah, me too,” Blake looked down to get another look of their hands before she slid her hand away and unbuckled her seatbelt. She hated having to let go, especially with the forlorn expression on Yang’s face but she didn’t want to over stay her welcome at the moment, despite how she felt about it.

As she went for the handle to let herself out, the rumble of the engine ceased and heard the driver door open. “I’ll walk you to the door.” Yang was already shutting the door by the time Blake’s shoes hit the blacktop. The blonde was standing in front of the truck, waiting on Blake to meet her, both hands in her front pockets while bouncing on the balls of her feet. Blake could read the nervous energy emitting from Yang. Her chest pounded at the thought of anything happening.

They walked across the small parking lot, bumping shoulders all the way to the door. The porch light was on indicating Weiss was courteous enough for Blake to search for the right key, “Thanks for walking me to the door, Yang. I appreciate it.” She pulled the set of keys from her front pocket, eyeing the right one.

“Don’t mention it. It’s the least I could do for you since you wasted your whole day with me... And I hope I didn’t get you in trouble for calling in.”

“It was worth it. Also, you didn’t _waste_ my day. I enjoyed every minute, even if you did kick my ass at disc golf,” the keys felt heavy in her hand as she found a way to stall Yang from leaving.

Yang flashed a toothy smile, eyes lighting up in the dim light, “I’m glad you enjoyed it.” Her hands slipped out of her pocket and gestured with her hand her to open the door, “You should probably get inside... we wouldn’t want Weiss to start worrying by spamming you with messages.”

“Yeah... we wouldn’t want that...” Blake took a deep breath as she turned away to unlock the door. “Well, goodnight, Yang. Please drive safe.” Disappointment etched in her words.

“Sure thing. Goodnight,” Yang watched her enter the apartment and shut the door with a soft click. She exhaled the breath she didn’t notice she’d been holding and began to walk to her truck. She was pissed at herself for not doing anything she had planned that day. She planned on telling her how she felt but that went out the window the minute she saw that face.

She pulled her keys from her back pocket and stood there, juggling the thought of kissing Blake. She was killing herself and letting herself down by not acting on it. She looked back to the apartment and the light had already been shut off but it didn’t stop her from contemplating her next move. “Fuck it.”

She jogged across the cracked blacktop to her door and she heard the lock click before she could lift a hand to knock. As the door swung open, Blake took two steps past the threshold, a shimmer of happiness in her eyes as she took in the sight of a breathless Yang Xiao Long in front of her. “Bla—“ before Yang could say her name, Blake fisted the fabric over the blonde’s chest, pulling her forward in haste. Blake’s lips were on hers in a tender kiss that she had never felt before.

As Yang registered what was actually happening, she fell into it, bringing her hand to Blake’s neck to run her fingers through her dark hair, memorizing the topography of her lips. Yang tested her, running her tongue along her top lip asking for entrance which Blake gave without a second thought. Their breath in sync between each motion as if they had been designed for each other since the beginning. There was no denying it now — now that she got a taste, she wanted more. She wanted everything Blake was willing to give but now was not the time. Not because they were standing on Blake’s porch but because Yang didn’t want to rush into something neither one of them could ever return from

She felt Blake’s body press to hers with every intention to trade reason for lust. Knowledge of how parts of Blake fit against her body shattered her focus.

Yang broke away against everything she wanted in this moment, licking her lips to taste where Blake’s tongue made claim and pulled her hands away from the heated skin beneath her fingertips. She halfway expected to see disappointment but the enthusiasm of her reception proved otherwise. Blake was a smiling mess.

Blake took a few steps back into the door way, slender fingers resting on the frame, not once taking her eyes off the blonde. She wanted Yang to stay and see what would happen if given the opportunity but wanted to leave Yang with her own abandon. As awful as it sounded to her, she wanted Yang to burn just as much as she did.

Yang began to step down backwards, eyes still on woman who did so little to make her sweat in sixty degree weather. “Goodnight, Blake.”

“Goodnight, tiger.”

 

 

 


	6. slowly but surely, bringing you back to me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the wait, guys. Things have been a little shitty in my neck of the woods and it’s taken a toll on my momentum. Hopefully I can shake off this funk and get back into the swing of things :)
> 
> ALSO, thank you to everyone who’s taken the time to check this thing out! I’m pretty bad about responding but I’m gonna do my best from here on out :) you guys are the reason I continue with this. Major props!!

A ridiculous grin lingered on her lips through the entire twenty minute drive from Blake’s apartment. This was probably the best night she had in a long while, running the scene through her mind for the umpteenth time. The sweetness of her lips, the aggression in her touch, honor on her breath... It all rushed back to her.

Headlights seared through the darkness, barely managing to keep attention on the road. There were a few times when she spaced out enough to not remember bit and pieces of her venture home. Pitch black colored the street as she turned off the main road, moonlit rays helped illuminate the surroundings the headlights couldn’t. At least the moon was dependable unlike the street light that burned out days ago.

Parking the truck in haste, she hit the dip at the beginning of the withering driveway, swaying side to side by the momentum. Stars reminded her how late in the evening it was but the time spent with Blake had been worth the sacrifice of sleep.

The porch light was on as a precaution of the uneven first step she tripped on, nearly busting her chin open on a drunken night. It was probably a night she tried anything she possibly could to get the brunette off her mind and out of her heart. There had been too many of them to keep track of.

She slipped through the doorway, carefully checking around like a teenager about to get caught sneaking back in from a romantic rendezvous. Not like anything was going to happen, she wanted to avoid an unwarranted interrogation. She could visualize Ruby in her usual recliner, open textbook in her lap and papers sprawled across the arms of the worn chair. Red headphones dangled over her book allowing Yang to exhale a sigh of relief from the possibility she could make it to her bedroom unscathed.

Electric blue radiated against her bed from the LED glowing from her wall charger underneath the nightstand. It was a good enough nightlight for her liking. She reached for the lamp switch with muscle memory, or so she thought, failing after a few attempts. A flash of light filled the room, instantly erasing the blue with a bold hue of butterscotch from the low wattage bulb. Keys sang its metal chorus as they met the wooden bedside table, recklessly scattered on their joining ring.

Her boots slipped off one by one, kicking them against the side of the bed. Her weight sank into the mattress, mixed emotions surging every nerve. The bed was comfortable enough to soothe her tense muscles but wasn’t near soft enough to soothe the stress. She finally worked the courage to do something but not commit to telling her. Maybe that was the first step — the boost, mind you. Her eyes locked onto the popcorn on the ceiling and adjusted her forearm underneath her head, gold hair spread across her pillow with careless freedom — dazed and hypnotized.

Her other hand scratched the itch by her navel but left it there as if contemplating what she was to do next and how it was going to be executed. She stretched her neck to the table, looking over to her scroll but couldn’t figure if there was anything alerting her. She reached for it in an awkward position trying her best not to accidentally push it onto the floor. The scroll was dark. She wondered if Blake was staring at the same darkness...

The pattern was drawn on screen and opened up the messages, her picture immediately showing up next to her name. ‘ _What should I say? Should I even say anything and just wait or...?_ ’  She tossed the thought from one idea to another. Patience had never been her strong suit although it was a supposed virtue... The screen went dark without deciding then tapped the scroll against her thigh, hoping for some insight.  ‘ _What would Blake do?_ ’  “Fuck, I have no idea,” she answered herself aloud.

This was already driving her up a all. She went two years without messaging or hearing her voice and now she can’t live without? How did she manage the isolation the first time?

Lifting herself up, she pulled the shirt over her head and tossed it to the floor by her boots. Five o’clock comes early and Yang was far from sleep but she needed to at least try. Her pants came off next, also flung to the floor. The scroll laid on the bed, still black but she took it anyways. Once more, the screen flashed to life and went to Blake’s last message from the previous night.

“I don’t want to sound lame but I’m kIndia missing you rn,” she spoke as she typed. She read the sentence a few times then hit the send. “God, this sounds clingy...” The phone dropped to her side and waited. The air she breathed ballooned in her lungs as the phone vibrated with a chime. “Shit!”

_You’re definitely lame lol_

_I cant help that it’s one of my best qualities *shrugs*_

_There’s nothing wrong with that_

_Shouldn’t you be in bed by now?_

_I am in bed. Can’t sleep_

_Maybe you should stop thinking about me then_

_Impossible. Not after what you did_

_Lol what I did?! Weren’t you about to do the same thing?_

Yang felt panic strike her chest, her fingers felt numb. Technically she was right but would rather not be suggested as the instigator.

_What if I wasn’t?_

_I would have a hard time believing you_

A smirk slid onto her lips, thumbs doing their best to hit every letter  but the one she needed. Having to hit the backspace enough began to wear on her nerves.

_I was just gonna kiss you, not attack you_

_I highly doubt that._

_You’re outlook on me is hurtful, B. Ive been_

_nothing_ _but sweet and this is how you treat me?_

_What a shame._

_Go to bed butt-head. I think your lack_

_of sleep is catching up to you._

_Oh, I see how it is lol fine, ill hit the hay_ _ONLY_

_because_ _I want to, not because you told me :)_

_Goodnight, I’ll hyu tomorrow. Sweet_ _dreams._

_Only if you’re there... goodnight._

 

The phone was silent after her last message, heart racing the more she thought about it. It felt like Blake had this whole thing planned from the beginning and  she fell for it. Not that she was complaining, she just wished it happened sooner. All this time wasted thinking about her, being a coward and never taking what she wanted. It was different now, things between them had finally changed for the better and now she was going to have to give in. Not that she hadn’t already.

She slipped off the bed to flip the switch then slid under the covers, wondering what she did in her life to get to where she was now. Sure, things could be better but they could also be a lot worse. She mostly wondered what set them down this path, this destiny, they had always averted. Some path taken or decision made drove them to this point in time.

Feeling the cool air of her room didn’t seem to help with easing her to sleep. Darkness only made her burn hotter, a fire she was too familiar with. Dealing with it felt awkward but her hand inched to her waist, hesitating to move any further. A few seconds was all she needed to make the decision to do it. Slender fingers coasted where she felt the most heat, treading lightly to the band of her underwear, lungs on the verge of collapsing. She wanted to,  _needed_ to cure her affliction — the pressure was too much to bear.

It’s not the first time Blake spiked her nerves like that but for some reason, it felt different to attempt self-satisfaction with her on the mind. Lord did she want to though... Her hand slid from the waistband onto the cold, wrinkled sheets and curled her fingers into the fabric. Blake kept her awake with her honey eyes, disappearing behind thick lashes. She knew sleep wouldn’t come easy tonight — not with the way her mind was slowly killing her.

~~~~~

High noon hadn’t even made it’s full ascent and already the temperature was warm enough to melt her skin. The humidity, however, made the air difficult to breathe. Heat was a preference opposed to the cold but damn did it have drawbacks. In order to wear hardly anything she’d been used to, she had to suffer at the hands of summer’s mercy. What made the shop the closest place next to hell was the fact she had to wear sleeves and pants despite her distaste for extra fabric. She understood the ‘necessity’ for covering her skin in a protective layer but literally sweating her ass off wasn’t a fair trade.

Unfortunately it was only Tuesday and she had three more days of the sun’s bullshit to deal with before a reprieve. Mostly, she might get the chance to see Blake. She was the force driving her to suck it up and truck through the rest of the week.

She found herself engrossed in a conversation with one of the younger male coworkers, sharing stories from their weekend since she decided to elongate it by an extra day. Blake was the focus of her conversation, obviously showing signs of how smitten she was. She shared more of the experience driving the Javelin than the woman she fell hard for, keeping the best details for herself.

Through the reenactment of dropping the shifter and flooring it, the young man grabbed Yang’s attention with a nod, eyeing something behind her. “Who’s that?”

Her attention remained on Mercury, unaffected by the change of subject, “Probably a customer, Merc. Go see what she needs. I’m banned from customer interaction, remember?”

He nodded and made the motion to move past her but stopped before he could gain any distance. His voice barely reached Yang’s ears, “Dude, she’s pointing to _you_.” Mercury playfully tapped her with the back of his hand, “Lucky, this chick is hot as _fuck_. I’m sure you could get away with  one  customer.”

She turned, expecting an exaggeration of what Mercury would describe as ‘hot’ but no, he was one hundred percent right. The woman wasn’t just hot, she was  beautiful.  And the air from her lungs was stolen the second she registered who the woman was, leaning against the frame of the bay door with her legs crossed, hands slightly tucked in the front pockets of her torn jeans. Bangs in her eyes, inducing the mystery beneath, did enough to Yang needing to steadily pace herself over without seeming too eager. She did hate that she was in a state of grunge and wanted nothing more that to touch the ivory skin of Blake’s cheek. All she could do was mimic Blake’s stance when she approached, “So... What’s a gorgeous girl like you doing in a shithole like this?”

“I came to see someone before I left for work. I was hoping I’d find her here,” her voice was soft with enough of an edge to it to slice the shivers in Yang’s spine.

“Maybe I can help,” finger and thumb came to rest on her chin, bottom lip pursed as if deep in thought. “What does she look like?”

Blake pushed herself off the frame inching closer, taking one hand from her pocket to slide it across the lapel of Yang’s stained jumpsuit, fingers running over the graying name tag sewed onto the navy blue fabric, “She’s about five-ten, blonde, smirk that screams trouble, _unbearably_ charming... Is she around here?”

Yang had remind herself to breathe. Whatever Blake was trying to do  now , sure as fuck was working. She bit her bottom lip inhaling the honeysuckle of Blake’s skin. She was terrified by how much control the woman had over her, it was impossible to deny. Her weight subtly shifted between each foot then made the motion to lean down until her nose hovered inches away from Blake’s, “I... think you found her.”

Restraint weighed heavy on her hands, fists balled in her baggy pockets. Her jaw tightened, unsure of what to do. Surely she could improvise snagging her second kiss from Blake without them but they acted as a support system to latch on with.

Blake grinned at the blonde and took a few steps back, setting foot out the large exit, “Good because I think I need you to check something out on my car if you’re not too busy.” Playing coy seemed more difficult in theory than actual execution and she was having fun with it — a blast, realistically.

Yang looked back with a cocked eyebrow at Mercury, questioning the idea with a shrug. His only gesture was mouthing ‘go!’ and pretending to shoo her out the door. She nodded slightly, taking the young man’s gesture to heart as it slammed against her chest plate. She followed Blake out the door to the parking lot, dirty hands lodged in her pockets.

The matte black car fell under the shade from across the gravel parking lot, luring Yang to find relief from the brief stroll in the sun. She tried her hardest to not stare at Blake’s backside, pretending to be interested in her surroundings though catching a glimpse every few seconds.

Blake pressed her fingertips to the paint, sliding them on the fender toward the windshield then back. Her eyes caught Yang’s as she turned, halting the blonde in her tracks, her lips curled with affection. Nothing prepared for a defense, Yang only smiled back, inching closer to Blake.

“So what seems to be the problem?” Lilac trailed the body of the car then carefully landed onto a magnificent shade of gold. Tongue sliding over the skin of her dry lips, thinking of her next move. It was obvious what she wanted to do but couldn’t figure _how_ she  was to do it.

Gravel crunched beneath Blake’s keds closing the short distance to almost nothing, arms crossing over her chest, eyes glinting with authority, “I’m sure you already know.”

Yang pulled her hands out of their blazing prison, rivaling Blake’s stance once more, “I can’t read minds, Belladonna. You need to show me.” A dimple formed on her cheek, watching the composure in front of her crumble to nothing.

Her stance broke, hands traveling to Yang’s strong jawline easing her downwards, feeling safe under a gentle lavender stare. She held Yang in her hands, contemplating possibilities, “The problem is that I needed you to kiss me.”

Nerves shot through her body to her chest, the same familiar feeling she was accustomed to. Shaking hands rested on Blake’s waist, grip tightening with each breath she took. She didn’t care anymore about how dirty they were — nothing mattered except Blake. With one last breath she took in, her rash need to feel those lips on hers again took over. The air between, sweetened in texture, drew her in to taste the source of it all. Yang closed the gap, taking Blake for her own, slowly moving her lips across Blake’s at her own pace. Air left Blake’s nose in a rush to take in more. An ecstatic smile grew against Blake’s lips being the cause of such animalistic poise.

The hands on her face traveled through her hair, pulling her in deeper, a dance with her tongue against Yang’s velvet, hopelessly losing control of what she worked so hard to pin down. Their lips learned the steps quickly, anticipating the next move from the other, unsure of who was leading who.

If Yang wasn’t sweating before the kiss, then she definitely was now. Her body temperature rose exponentially, inner core melting away at every touch Blake’s fingers induced on her skin. A hand left its spot on Blake’s waist to the zipper on her chest, dragging it down for ventilation. The the top half of the jumpsuit shimmied off her shoulders, down her arms, not breaking away from the sugar of Blake’s rouge lips. All that was left on her chest was a black tank top and glistening skin.

A simple tug on her blonde hair shattered her into a submissive subject allowing Blake to take whatever she needed and do whatever she wanted. There was no question about it — it was all hers.

Fingers dug back into Blake’s skin to ground her from floating away to the stratosphere. A bite on Yang’s bottom lip made her fingers clench then loosen. Her hands laid flat on the tight skin once Blake released, drifting up her obliques beneath her button down blouse. In a lightning reaction, Blake broke contact by adding distance away.

The look in Yang’s eyes was more apologetic than anything else, “I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to do that.”

Blake shook her head to counter the apology, refusing to make eye contact, “Don’t apologize, it wasn’t your fault. I’m still...” She took a calming breath then met a lilac stare, “I’m just.. fucked up.”

Yang dropped her weight against the Javelin while processing Blake’s body language curling into herself. She could tell Blake was in distress. Helping her arose apprehension, not having any idea of what to do. Would Blake allow help or would she deflect it?

A hand reached out and rested on her arm in a feather light touch, barely heavy enough to detect, “Hey, don’t worry about it. Whatever happened, you know you can tell me, right? No judgement.”

Blake’s stiff form melted from the touch and she was thankful.

“I... really want to...” Her voice was small and drifted lower than what Yang’s ears could pick up. “But I’m not ready to tell you, yet. I just don’t know  how.”

Yang lifted from the car, her other hand landing on Blake’s other arm. She dipped her head to look at Blake’s terror stricken features. Her voice flowed within the space between them, hands expressing a guiding touch, “Blake? Could you look at me, please?” Her plea drew Blake’s sullen gold to her own eyes, a crease in her brow prominent but cooperative. “I don’t know what he did to you but when you’re ready to talk, I’m here. And I don’t want you to think for a second that you have to do anything you’re not willing to just to make me happy. Tell me if I’m getting too handsy. Tell me if I make you feel uncomfortable about  _anything_ , oKay ? Just tell me,  please.  I care about you too much for you to be unhappy.”

Her golden eyes held a storm of emotion when looking at Yang’s compassionate expression, “Thank you, Yang. You have no idea how much it means to me hearing that.”

Throwing her a luminous grin, she took Blake by the torso in a hug hoping to add ease to the sudden change of atmosphere. Hands slid across her tank top reciprocating compassion that was shown for the other. “Would you want to be with someone damaged?”

Yang closed her eyes, absorbing Blake’s pain as her own, hand reaching to rest on the silky dark hair, “Babe, you’re not damaged. You’ve just experienced some negative shit and honestly... I don’t want anyone but _you_ .” She didn’t expect her impromptu break to take such a drastic turn but it was worth every scar her heart healed from over the years. Worth every single shred. “I missed you so much.”

Burying her face into the navy fabric, Blake inhaled the calming aroma of grease and oil. Knowledge settled the dust clouding her reasoning, granting a smile to chip away at the stone surrounding her secrets, “I’ve missed you, too.”


	7. your eyes have too many colors (and i can only try)

The door slammed harder than expected in a whirlwind, rushing to get to the driver in the rumbling car waiting curbside. Fuel vapors swirled in her sinuses, triggering older memories when she closed in on the matte black car, checking out the woman behind the wheel. Wayfarer sunglasses covered the shining gold behind them but couldn’t hide the smile as Yang bent down and looked into the car.

“Hey there, hot stuff.”

Even if she was able to keep a straight at Yang’s terrible jokes most of the time, she couldn’t hide the laugh building in her chest and shook her head in disbelief at the uncouth comment, “‘Hey there, hot stuff’,” she repeated with no zeal behind it. “Really? That’s the _best_ you  got?”

The door popped open and the weight rocked with Yang’s enthusiastic entrance, slightly out of breath from the short sprint, “Oh, trust me. I can do _way_ better . Only thing is that I don’t think red suits you very well.” She leaned over meeting in the middle for a kiss, which Blake happily accepted. It was quick for their standards but it declared what needed to be said in that moment. “I missed you by the way.”

“You saw me last night when I got home. You couldn’t’ve possibly missed me that much,” she teased the blonde, punching the gas. Tires grabbed the asphalt with a squeal, RPMs climbing with each gear. Even over the loud roar of the engine, all she could hear were excited sounds coming from the passenger seat.

Yang took the hand resting on the shifter in her own and lifted the ivory skin to her lips, trailing them over the sharply cut knuckles, “So you’re saying you didn’t miss me? Not even a little bit?”

“Of course I did. Probably not as much as you, though,” her hand tightened around Yang’s thumb, emphasizing her adoration for the contact. It was everything she’d been deprived of toward the end of her relationship with Adam. She needed a calming medicine for the hostile rush of emotions she still harbored against the man who destroyed her inner peace. She knew she could find a happier path with Yang. All she needed to do was pave it.

“Okay, then. I see how it is,” Yang’s hand released and flattened against Blake’s palm, needing contact with the warm skin. She slid her fingertips to the heel of her palm then rose to the base of Blake’s fingers, intertwining them together. “And here I thought you liked me or something.”

Blake drifted her eyes to Yang, who already had lilac meeting her gaze, lips curling at the edges, “Something like that.”

A toothy grin appeared as Yang looked away toward the sunset, purples integrated with oranges and reds the closer the sky came in contact with the distant horizon, “Yeah, something like that.”

 

~~~~~

 

Saturday nights were always a hit or miss when avoiding a rush on date night. It wasn’t written in stone that they made this a date, Yang assumed by the planning in advance. She made sure to be on her best behavior and dressed accordingly despite wanting to throw all reservations out the window and take Blake to the restroom to do ungodly things with her out of the public eye.

“I never told you how beautiful you look tonight. Not that you don’t every day,” Yang said, taking a slow sip of her drink, speaking loud enough over the moderately suggestive music playing from the sound system.

“Thank you, you don’t look too bad yourself,” she tucked a lock of hair behind her ear and genuinely smiled at the sunshine beside her, fingertips gliding across the condensation of her Old Fashioned. Ideas of what she could do with them on Yang propelled her into taking a sizable drink. She didn’t want her evening controlled by those thoughts. Hopefully drinking will help soften the intense thought of Yang and what she was capable of. Yeah, sure.

The bartender approached waving a finger to the women asking if they would like another round. “I’ll take a double shot of Maker’s, please,” Blake cleared her throat afterwards and Yang just looked at her with rounded eyes, surprised Blake was hitting the liquor so quickly into their ‘date’.

“I’ll just take another. Spicy, please?” She answered, pointing to the drink. The bartender flashed them a thumbs up and replying with an ‘I’ll get right on those’ and walked off toward the myriad of alcohol bottles stacked on shelves.

Yang crossed her arms on the counter’s surface on the offense, crease between her brows when she ducked her head a few inches, “Are you okay? You seem kinda, I dunno, uncomfortable? We don’t have to be here, you know.”

“What? No! I’m fine. It’s nice being able to do this with you. Crowds make me feel a little awkward, I suppose.”

An eyebrow arched, not being swayed by Blake’s answer but decided to let it slide, “Are you enjoying yourself at least?” Blake nodded her head then glanced at her with a look in her eye she’d never seen but understood the undertone. To say it lightly, she was terrified.

“Of course! Free drinks from the gorgeous blonde at the bar is definitely enjoyable,” she teased, slapping Yang’s shoulder with the backs of her fingers.

Yang leaned closer to Blake enough to touch elbows, “I hope the stunning brunette enjoys burning a hole in my pocket.” As she finished, the bartender landed the drinks in front of them, finishing with ‘Lemme know if you need anything else’.

Blake took the first shot as soon as the man left to tend other customers. Too many things going on in her head was almost too much to bear. The past week since Yang came back into her life was overwhelming and she apparently needed Whiskey to feel things she chose to ignore. One of them being lust... she hated that word but she hated the feeling even more. Then she reached for the second, the burn of the dark liquor no longer affecting her. That’s how she knew she was on the road to being drunk.

Yang knew something was wrong regardless of what Blake told her a few minutes ago. Everything about her body language screamed ‘uncomfortable’. She might be blonde but she wasn’t stupid. Her hand rested on the one resting on the counter beside the two empty shot glasses, giving a small squeeze of reassurance. If there was really something wrong, she needed Blake to feel like it was okay to tell her the truth. Badgering her for open honesty could potentially create an issue.

Songs proved there wasn’t a specific genre in mind and Yang was glad to know a few of them by heart, some barely acquaintances. From the corner of her eye when she left Blake to deal with her own thoughts, she could see a bob of the head and a slight dip in her shoulders in tune with the beat. ‘ Finally ,” she thought, happy to know she was visibly cutting loose.

Another long sip of the cocktail and a few seconds to pass before pushing anything, Yang leaned over with her lips inches away from Blake’s ear, “You wanna dance? I know you’ve got moves.”

Her body froze in the middle of dancing in her seat but quickly responded with what little air she had in her lungs, “N-not really. I think the Whiskey’s finally hitting me. Maybe here in a little while if that’s fine with you?”

“Sure thing,” she chose not to move away, resting her chin on Blake’s shoulder. “You sure you’re okay?”

Blake turned her head in Yang’s direction, “Of course I’m okay. I just have a lot on my mind is all. If there  was  something upsetting me, you’d be the first one to know. I promise.”

Yang lifted herself from Blake to look her in the eyes, a genuine smile shining within them, “Sorry I asked...” The look was back, the same one she could recognize a million times over. It was entrancing and alluring. With the alcohol talking, she inched towards Blake’s lips until the smooth skin came in contact with hers. Whiskey flared prominently on the woman’s breath. It was calming, familiar.

It wasn’t like Blake to show public displays of affection but Yang made it so damn hard not to. The thought had been there since the moment they walked into the bar. She knew the risks of drinking with Yang nearby and this was what she was trying to avoid. It was proof she was hopeless even when she tried to secure self-control.

She moved against Yang’s lips in a steady motion not wanting to be  that  couple making out at a bar but in actuality, she  wanted  to be that couple. A few seconds was enough for her to put on display. Anymore than that, she would need to throw a fifty on the counter and drag Yang out.

“You taste good,” there was no attempt at a joke, dead serious, speaking loud enough for Blake to pick up. “I wonder what else you taste like.”

The flush of red was hidden well enough by the ill illuminated room, heart racing in her chest. She was on the losing end of a winning battle. “Maybe... you’ll find out.”

Yang displayed a lazy grin when looking directly into a dreamy set of gold. She finished off the last of her Bloody Mary while reaching for her wallet in her back pocket, making sure to show some kind of restraint. She tossed a few bills on the counter and stood from the stool, tucking the wallet back into her pocket. Her hand held out to Blake which she took almost instantly. Grace wasn’t Blake’s best quality after a few quick shots of whiskey.

Blake held onto Yang’s calloused hand all the way to the car. She wasn’t impaired enough to stumble, she just wanted to feel the warmth of those hands...

“Keys, please,” Yang held her other hand out. She could honestly say she was the most sober between them.

“I can—“

“You  can  but you’re  not.  I’m alright, Blake. The first one was stout but the second one seemed kinda weak,” her hand still held out showed she wasn’t going to back off.

She reached into her front pocket and dropped them into Yang’s outstretched hand. “Thank you.”

Yang guided her to the passenger side, unlocking the door manually from the outside and swung the door open with an overzealous bow, “My lady.”

Blake placed a chilled hand on Yang’s cheek then dropped into the stock bucket seat. It was nice knowing there was someone who treated her the way she wanted to be treated and Yang was the epitome of the person she wanted to be with. She knew how to make her feel wanted and like the woman she deserved to be; open, free and liberated.

She didn’t realize Yang had made it into the car until the engine roared to life. Maybe the alcohol was hitting her harder than she expected, maybe she was lost in a dream of the woman beside her. She reached for the aftermarket radio, turning up the volume to hopefully calm the waves her mind was drowning under.

With the whiskey haze she floated in, she looked out the window barely paying attention to what was going on in the cab. She was oblivious to the the way Yang kept looking over, the rise and fall of her chest... signs Blake needed to see were lost and ignored.

The drive had been a quiet one. It felt like that was their routine together. Music had a way of letting her fall into a distracting reverie, consumed in the serenity of the sound. She recognized where she was once she broke away from her thoughts, they were a few blocks away from her apartment. For her, the night was too early to say goodnight.

“Yang? Could you stop the car, please?” Her voice showed no signs of distress.

The car drifted to the low shoulder on the dark stretch of road, tires sliding over the grass and gravel, “You feeling alright?” Concern buried within Yang’s eyes.

Blake’s nod was reinforced behind a soft stare, proving Yang was the only thing she had on her mind. “I-I was going to take you up on that dance? If you still want to...”

Brows arched by the sudden change of heart, “Here?”

“Yes, here.”

Yang peeked at the road behind her, then ahead, seeing it was clear. The road usually didn’t carry as much traffic but at night it seemed to be deserted — which was perfect, “Okay.” 

Blake stayed behind a few seconds after Yang ducked out, seemingly anxious by her posture and the scuffle of a few rocks by her boot. The sight was enough to make her laugh below the sound of the random playlist blaring through the speakers. ‘ It’s now or never, Belladonna.’  A few heavy breaths later and she was out of the passenger side, meeting Yang in the blue halogen lights.

Yang apprehensively made the first move to close the space, gravity pulling her toward the inevitable, fingertips ambushing Blake’s pant line as they tickled the exposed skin she had no intention of contacting. Her hands took charge, drawing her closer, bodies pressed until here was nothing there but the clothes against their skin. A rising pace in their breathing and the alcohol wore thin in the air before they could take the next breath.

In return, Blake slowly wrapped her arms around her neck, allowing Yang to take the lead, stepping side to side like two awkward teenagers. Blake rested her head against Yang’s chest, spying on the pounding below. Yang’s heart gave away what she wanted to know, whether or not she knew what was going to happen  if  it was to happen. But simply knowing Yang felt some sort of unease, it sent a smile to her lips.

“This song takes me back,” Yang spoke, chin resting against the crown of Blake’s dark hair. “I thought you hated Kings of Leon.”

Her shoulders lifted in response, “I  did  but I knew how much you liked them. It was hard to hate them when they always made me think of you.”

Yang let out a short laugh, “It’s kind of hard not to believe that.”

Anxiety flooded through her by the intimacy dancing reflected. There had been a plethora of times they found themselves in compromising positions, testing their virtue in explicably heated moments when given the chance but never once did those instances turn into something more.  This  however, felt more sensual. She just needed to test the waters first.

“I always thought of you. The way I lashed out at you then... it felt like I needed to grab and hold onto anything that remotely reminded me of you and it started with them.  This  song actually.”

Blake could feel the smirk made across her hair, “Radioactive? I didn’t expect this of all songs.”

“I didn’t either but it just... it hit me hard when I heard it.” Thunder rolled in the distance, close enough to take caution yet far enough to take cover. Blake perked up, eyes searching the sky in the direction the incoming storm, searching for the lightning to save her.

The song ended with the lead riff, ending abruptly without fading out. She released her hold from around Yang’s neck, resting them on her solid shoulders and caught the shining flakes of amethyst. Yang removed one of her hands from Blake’s waist, making sure to catch skin as her fingertips left her jeans to cup her cheek with the purest sincerity she could give.

 _Hold_ _me up in the palm of your hand_

Chills ran up Blake’s spine, not from the cold front invading their night, but from recognition of younger days when she fought off her feeling for Yang. The same feelings she thought weren’t real but just a phase, until she found out it was love and nothing less.

_Your metaphors, your silent calls  
_

_Your feelings are too real_

_This_ was  Yang’s song. It was the impossible truth taxing her resolution. It was the truth she hesitated to speak. Most days the truth was too far away to grasp. Others, hanging on the edge of her tongue, ready to fall.  She  was ready to fall.

Blake couldn’t restrain from the dreamy eyes Yang gave her, taking one of her hands into the golden locks, fingers deciding their next course of action. Pulling her down with gusto, Blake hungrily took what she felt was ripe for the taking.

_Hey, I’m in love, I’ll take you up again_

She took Yang’s bottom lip between her teeth, feeling the change in Yang’s breathing. The hand on her cheek possessively held on as if Blake were to revive her from being deprived of her aura for so long. Her hand resting on Blake’s waist fell downward over the back pocket of her jeans, the grip on her hair tightened, pleading for something more. Something Yang was willing to give.

Blake lead Yang to the car in quickened and clumsy steps, falling back onto the edge of the hood. Her tongue brushed across Yang’s top lip then caught it between hers, body taking control of all sensibility. She could feel Yang’s sturdy hands on her ass, suddenly lifting her up and setting her on the hood.

Their breathing strained after each kiss but refusing to let the other go, choosing to die before getting their fix. Blake could imagine Yang being more potent than heroin, coursing through her system, withdrawing when without.

Yang stood between Blake’s open legs, heat generated in the short amount of time, wanting — needing — to be swallowed whole by the torrent of fire. She tilted Blake back onto the hood, kisses drifting across the hollow of her neck and to the exposed clavicle of her low cut v-neck shirt. A hand clawed at the back of her shirt in what felt like a demand for something more sinister. Something they wanted. Something they couldn’t come back from.

Weight applied onto Blake gave Yang control of the situation, lips desecrating the base of her neck followed by teeth making her mark. With each motion, she felt Blake’s pelvis rock against her. Her tongue scoured the skin before looking to Blake and her unkempt form, “Is this okay?” She was a wreck and glowing on the black hood under the brief flashes of lightening overhead.

Blake took back possession of Yang’s lips in a slow and hungry answer before breaking off, “We should go before we get caught in the storm.”

“Babe, I’m already caught,” her index finger traced the form of Blake’s jaw to her ear then back to her lips. Her lips took Blake’s with greed, leading her touch onto the breast under her own. The illicit rise and fall of Blake’s chest did more to Yang’s self-control more than how her body reacted to the chemicals she fell into.

Rain battered the hood in short measure, thunder resounding after each blue flash. The storm was over them, waiting to birth the downpour that came with it. With a suspended kiss, Blake let go of the shirt clutched in her hands, rain coming down with more force, with each strike.

Yang unmounted from Blake, assisting her with an extended hand and lead her to the open passenger side before throttled her pace around the front to her own. The energy in the cab had Yang floor the pedal, lurching forward like a rocket into loves unknown mystery.

Whatever Blake possessed her with had a suffocating hold on her, whipping into the first spot she could find, killing the engine almost immediately. Blake was already out of the car by the time Yang swung the door open, pulling the blonde out of her seat with the vigor and untamable lust of a predator going in for the kill. How Blake took control of the situation made her grin in the most lustrous way possible. Being  devoured by the Blake’s hidden vulturous teeth enticed the situation even more.

Keys fumbled in her fingers, with Blake hanging on, those teeth scraping the sensitive skin on her neck before she found the right one. ‘ _ This is happening. This is really happening .’  _ Yang’s internal panic showed through her features unbeknownst to Blake. Her attention was elsewhere. 

The living room was pitch once the door was shut, minus the dim kitchen light used as a beacon to make their way around. The only souls in the quarters were theirs.

Yang pressed Blake against the door with more force than expected, rising a laugh from her partner who encouraged the deed. She ravaged the flesh on the arch of Blake’s bare neck, an invitation to do what she pleased. Hands ran loose in possession skimming her ribs beneath the shirt, pressing her body against Blake to feel her soul, her vitality. She was ready to fuck her here against the door.

A moan vibrated against Yang’s lips, adding fuel to the fire. She lifted Blake’s melted form, legs wrapped around her waist as Yang took her to the room she had no knowledge of. It was as if she was entering a temple to be washed of sin — or swim in it.

Her foot nudged the door Blake pointed to, losing grip on consciousness with the woman in her arms attacking the base of her ear. It was hard for her to breathe.

Yang gently set Blake on the neatly made bed, watching Blake adjust against the pillows, luring her in. She slowly removed her boots, eyes not leaving the crumbling woman in her sights. Her hands went to Blake’s own, sliding them off, building pressure.

The bed molded to her hands and knees, crawling to lay beside her. She couldn’t remember a time she had been so nervous. Even the few times she made love to a prior conquest, they paled in comparison to the goddess beside her.

She lied on her side, catching the breath Blake took from her all too willing lungs, a hand taking the smaller in her own. The palm of Blake’s other hand rested on Yang’s flushed cheek in assurance. Not to be nervous? Terrified? That was inconceivable.

“Yang,” the voice was light and full of something she couldn’t place. “Touch me.”

She cleared boulder from her throat, heart about ready to break through her chest plate, “How?”

Nothing was said. The hand Yang held was taken into Blake’s possession, leading her south of her belt and leaving it there. Yang let go, nervous fingers contoured the curved of the zipper, placing pressure where Blake wanted. It worked in her favor watching Blake begin to move by the slightest touch. She undid the button of Blake’s tight jeans in one motion, undoing the short zipper. Royal purple underwear had her chest heaving.

Eyes were already on her by the time she made contact with the dazed gold watching. Yang kissed her slowly as her fingers lingered on the fabric, waiting for the okay in Blake’s body language. A tongue swept against hers, her fingers reached the hem of the barrier between now and the future. They dug below, a spike in her breath discovering the wet heat she was apprehensive of. She found the nub, barely applying any force just to feel the reaction gained.

Yang lightly bit onto Blake’s bottom lip as she drew circles on Blake’s clit, hips modestly rolling with the touch but her tongue said otherwise.

The hand left its spot to tug at the tight jeans constricting her of committing to anything more.

In a sudden reaction, Blake broke the kiss and looked to the door left wide open. “What’s wrong?” Yang was left to question the turn of events, noticing a flash of light in the hallway broke through the darkness only to see a shadow approach.

“Weiss is home.” Her voice mixed between irritation and defeat. How could she not hear the front door open?

Weiss was in the doorway, a surprised look on her face, turning a light shade of red accidentally catching a glimpse of Blake’s undone pants, “I, uh, see you two are... doing well.”


End file.
